


Loving you is a dirty job

by dizbil



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: J2M friendship, M/M, Romantic Comedy, stripper!matt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-09
Updated: 2013-02-09
Packaged: 2017-11-28 17:19:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 33,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/676929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizbil/pseuds/dizbil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the night of his birthday, Jensen has no choice but to follow his two best friends Misha and Jared. Except that Jensen is not in a mood to party at all, but maybe a cute stripper named Matt could help him to relax. And that's not all Matt does, before he even got a chance to realize what's happening, Jensen found himself with this sexy guy with green eyes, an amazing body and a lot of thing to say. Yes, Jensen wasn't prepared for Matt at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written with gwinchester (LJ)

Jensen was known to be a busy man, always running, always having a cup of coffee in his hand or always texting. But that was to expect from a med student. Now that he had graduated and had starting taking night shifts at the local hospital, he was even busier. So yeah, he had forgotten about the date, forgotten that it was his birthday... Until now. Two big smiles were facing him: Jared's and Misha's.  
  
"It's your birthday boy!" both his flatmates yelled and ran towards him.  
  
"Big plans for you tonight, I hope you are ready" said Misha after winking at Jared, thing that, by the way, was never a good sign  
  
"Come on, go change, we are waiting" they both crossed their arms "Be quick."  
  
"I have my own plans, that include a bath, me in my bed and lots and lots of sleep, sorry." Jensen was tired, really tired and now he also felt old, great.  
  
"Come on Jenny boy." Jared patted his shoulder. "You're like...the youngest oldest grumpy old man."  
  
"Totally true." agreed Misha.  
  
Jensen rolled his eyes because he didn't have time to play games with those two. "Just leave me alone okay? Yes it's my birthday and you know what I want? A quiet night at home."  
  
"Sorry, I'm afraid we can't have that." Misha shrugged.  
"We could always dress you if you are too tired. We're always here to help; roommate code." added Jared, and they both laughed as Jensen pouted and walked towards his room.  
"I hate both of you."  
  
Every damn muscle in Jensen's body ached, just like every Friday, and he just needed a private party with his bed. But no, his two "lovely" flatmates had other plans. No way in hell he was going to think too much about the clothes. He undressed while walking down the hall, ignoring the cat calls both men sent his way.  
He opened his wardrobe and saw his Pink Floyd tee, the very comfy one, he smelled it and decided that since it wasn't that bad, he could still wear it.  
He put that on, followed by the first clean jeans he found and then he opened the door.  
  
"Are you two happy now?"  
"A lot." His friends looked at each other smiling "You look beautiful Jenny, now wear some pretty shoes and let's go."  
  
Jensen rolled his eyes and put his boots on, choosing to be comfortable over being pretty. Besides, he was too tired to argue. That was mostly why he didn't react when Jared slapped his ass, claiming he looked totally fuckable in those jeans, or when Misha insisted they took his car.  
  
Jensen just hated Misha's car; it was a big van with a bed and a TV in the back and to Jensen it just screamed "creepy". But he didn't say anything and he sat between his two friends; Misha driving and Jared close to the window. Jensen sighed as they left the driveway, he was totally going to regret this later. But the worst was yet to come, especially when Misha decided that it was time to use his iPod and put on some music.  
  
"Mish, can you turn down the volume? Just a bit...please, my head is going to kill me." He asked screaming over the too loud dance music in the van. Misha seemed to have a new favorite group, LMFAO, and Jensen really hated them.  
  
"Sorry I can't hear you, Jenny" Misha looked at him before starting to dance while driving, looking pleased when Jared started laughing.  
  
"Glad you two are having fun."  
  
Jensen closed his eyes and tried to remember again why he lived with them. If there was someone with a worse taste in music than Jared; it was Misha. Jensen thought that was what kept them together. He just wanted to chill out while listening to some classic rock, but that was so not going to happen, at least not in Misha's van.  
When he opened his eyes again he asked, "Anyway, where are we going?"  
Misha was too busy dancing so he turned to Jared.  
  
Jared smiled, no, correct that, he smirked and just answered: "It's a surprise Jenny darling. But trust us, you won't regret this."  
  
"Trust... trust you? Like the one time we went skinny dipping... with all of our clothes on? Or when you and Misha made me drink all that vodka before my exam? Or when you bought me that giant dildo for my birthday and I opened it in front of my grandma? You know what? Screw you Ja..."  
"We're here." suddenly Misha said, interrupting Jensen's monologue.  
  
They were out of the van in a second, leaving Jensen with his mouth open. He growled and kicked the door just because... It kinda felt good... He loved Misha and Jared from the bottom of his heart but sometimes... they were a huge pain in the ass.  
  
Anyway, he climbed out of the car and immediately frowned seeing where they were. In front of Misha... Misha... how could Jensen explain this? For some strange reason, Misha owned a strip club. Jensen had been there only once and it was before the big opening, and there was just no way he was going in now... Well okay, it had been a while since the last time he had sex but... but... but no... just no.  
  
"Okay I'm out" Jensen turned around starting to walk towards the car again.  
  
"Jenny! Please… It's not what you think, you’ll like it... please" Jared was puppy facing him, and that meant he had no chance to say no.  
  
"For how long?" he asked trying to avoid all types of eye contact with Jared.  
  
"Well, I say for a show, or half... For how long you wish it's your birthday after all." Misha said "And no, you have to at least step inside and grab a drink, at least. Jen... After you…"  
  
They both moved to let Jensen walk in before them.  
  
"Remind me, why we are friends again?" he asked. They both chuckled and walked up to him.  
  
"Well because without us your life would be boring" said Jared "and you would pretty much be the saddest man on Earth. We are what makes your life amazing." they both looked at each other before adding, "You can't deny it, Jenny."  
  
Jensen laughed and let the two men lead him inside. The place was...well not like he remembered, all the leopard print and glitter were new, it smelled of coconut and vanilla and the music was too loud for his taste.  
  
Jensen looked at Jared, who was practically like a kid in a toyshop, smile wide and bright eyes wandering around as he was snapping his fingers to the beat.  
  
"I love this place Jen, don't you think Misha did a splendid job?"  
"Yeah..splendid" Jensen said before smiling at the way Jared's hips moved to the rhythm.  
  
Jared smiled down at him once more before Jensen felt Misha wrap one arm around his waist, Jared's hand resting on his shoulder.  
  
"Come on Jenny." Jared whispered into his ear. "Let's get you drunk and then we'll give you your birthday present."  
  
"You're just going to love it." Misha added with a pleased smile.  
  
Jensen just couldn't fight them, they were in a great mood and it was kinda of contagious. That was why he found himself sitting at the bar with a shot of vodka in his hand and a bright smile on his face, his green eyes shiny into the darkness of the club.  
  
"I must say the glow-in-the-dark straws is a classy touch, Misha." Jensen finally said after they had a few drinks and it was nice because the waiter was automatically filling their empty glasses. Anyway, Jensen couldn't believe that was actually coming out of his mouth, but he was starting to have fun, his friends were there and for now it seemed like they only went there to have an open bar night to Misha's expenses.  
  
Misha laughed and said, "I pay so I set the rules." He grinned and continued "And we are going to move to the best part. Have you seen the new rooms? You'll love them… We have glow in the dark decoration in there too."  
  
"No Misha I haven't seen the new rooms, but something tells me I don't want to do that, right?"  
  
"No you don't... I'm gonna show you the dancers, it's way more fun."  
  
"Don't think it's such a good idea either."  
  
"Oh don't be such a wuss Jenny, come on!" Jared shouted over the music.  
  
Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was their smiles, anyway, Jensen followed them and soon, they found themselves in a more private part of the club. Jensen still had this drink in his hand, 'cause he just wanted to have a look and get back to the bar.  
  
"Okay, you're gonna love this part." Misha seemed suddenly as excited as Jared, and he called the dancers.  
  
"So here's Sebastian, Mark number one and Mark number two and..." Jensen wasn't really listening, none of those guys was his type anyway. Too big or too short, too muscled or not enough... No. Besides, Misha and Jared both knew he still had issues with his sexuality. Being bisexual was one thing, but having sex with men and women, was another thing. And Jensen mostly had women in his bed, and a few kisses exchanged with other male med students at their frat parties, but nothing big on the "I'm having sex with another human having a dick too" side.  
  
"And this is Matt."  
  
Jensen turned his head to take a good look at Matt and... Holy mother of... He almost spilled his drink and made his glass fall. Almost. But it was not his fault if he was facing the hottest man he had ever seen.  
  
Jensen blushed and looked down, trying to look calm and drank a little bit more. It was okay, no need to freak out, it wasn't like a guy this gorgeous could have any interested in him. So Jensen just looked at his boots. Misha moved closer to him as he saw his reaction.  
  
"I know, Jenny, I know" he whispered to his ear, then he looked around "Where the hell are the girls by the way?"  
  
Sebastian stepped out of the line and said, "Vicky and Gen said they are having trouble with the wings tonight, they will need 15 more minutes before the number, all the others are out and dancing." He smiled at Jensen and he quickly looked away.  
  
"Okay, so, time to go dance your pretty little butts off boys!" Misha said, loudly enough to cover the music. "Sebastian, I will be needing you in room 4, with me thank you."  
  
Jensen looked at Misha and laughed, he was the boss and took all the advantages he could.  
  
Sebastian grinned, "My pleasure boss, do you like my new costume?" Jensen supposed it was a sailor costume, because those nylon white and blue boxer briefs and tie were not enough fabric to identify what it was. Jensen eventually decided the man was a sailor.  
  
"Of course I do." said Misha before slapping the man's ass "Now go. Jared who are you picking tonight? Feeling like waiting for Gen or..?"  
  
When Misha and Jensen looked for Jared they found him spreading some oil on the blonde Mark's chest. "Umm… I'll go with this devil tonight" Jared said before taking the straw to his mouth and winking at Mark, who grabbed his hand and quickly lead him into room number 3.  
  
"This only leaves you out Jenny, who are you picking? Treat yourself… Birthday boy."  
  
"No, no, thanks I'll just go back to the bar, I don't-" Jensen looked down. He felt horrible about this picking thing… but before he had time to finish his sentence Matt interrupted him.  
  
"I'll have him boss."  
  
Jensen raised his eyes just in time to see a smile cross Matt's face. His grip on his glass tightened as he watched the way those beautiful lips twitched and the look those green eyes were giving him. Matt's eyes were a paler green than Jensen's, but still appealing, and Jensen gasped a little as Matt made his way next to him, because he was dressed as a half-naked fireman.  
  
And Jensen really didn't know what was the sexiest part about the outfit, the fact that he could stare at Matt's perfect and defined chest, the way the red suspenders were on his strong shoulders, how his big yellow pants seemed to be so loose on him, so loose Jensen could see the beginning of his hipbones and...was that a tattoo?  
  
"I'll take care of Birthday Boy, really good care."  
  
With that, Matt grabbed his free hand and led him to one of the rooms. Jensen turned to Misha, but Misha only winked at him. Okay, so much for the rescue, thought Jensen as Matt was closing the door behind him. The room was dark except for one lamp next to a couch sofa. Jensen looked up to Matt and he still had that "I'm gonna eat you alive" look. Jensen swallowed hard, shivering a bit when Matt pressed his hands on his chest. But it was only to push him down to the couch.  
  
"Shh... Just relax."  
Matt winked at him, as Jensen finally sat down on the couch.  
  
"Just relax and enjoy the show."  
  
With that, Matt disappeared behind the curtains for a moment. Jensen took a minute and inhaled deeply. What the fuck was happening? He could not be turned on by a male stripper...this was wrong on so many levels. Okay. Breathe. In. Out. Just one little dance and you get out, you steal Misha's key and you go home and forget about the whole thing.  
  
Jensen was calmer now and he looked around him. He just had to hope Matt wouldn't pick a lame pop song like the ones playing in the club. Just as he thought that, the intro of one of his favorite rock songs started, heavy on the guitar with the greasy voice of the singer. And just like that, the curtains opened, and so did Jensen's mouth.  
  
Matt had a fireman helmet on his head and a bright smile on his face. He started swinging his hips to the beat of the music. Oh god... This was so wrong... So... so... wrong thought Jensen, getting harder by the second. But Matt was way too appealing, way too perfect and... oh crap... He was coming near him. Jensen bit his lower lip and felt his cheek go read as Matt made his way towards him, hips still moving to the rhythm, his hands gently rubbing against his own chest. Jensen wanted to do that, and he wanted to lick his Adam's apple and kiss him and...  
  
Matt spread his legs open with his one knee and Jensen moaned, fucking moaned, because it was incredible sexy and Matt was so close to him, his strong body moving just right in front of him. Matt took off the helmet and put it on Jensen's head before he blew him a kiss. Jensen whimpered again and Matt turned, shaking his well-defined ass in front of him. Do not touch, do not touch, do not touch, Jensen was repeating to himself, but it was so tempting…  
  
Good thing Matt turned back again. He was playing with his suspenders this time and Jensen bit his lip harder seeing how the red fabric was pressing against Matt's nipple. He took them off and crawled to Jensen.  
  
"What the..."  
  
Oh fuck. Matt was straddling his hips now and there was just no way he couldn't feel Jensen's hard on. No freaking way. But he kept on going, he wrapped his arms around Jensen's neck, green eyes staring at him, and he rolled his hips to the beat. Jensen gasped feeling the fabric brush against his cock. Fuck it felt pretty good... But Jensen didn't move, he didn't touch, he let Matt move against him and watch, thinking that Matt fit perfectly into his arms.  
  
Soon it was over, and Matt was on his two feet again, he undid his zipper very slowly, Jensen's eyes on his crotch. The... This was too fast, too.. Jensen moaned again when Matt was in nothing but a really, really short boxer, but when his eyes found the two identical star tattoos fitting perfectly on his hips, he felt his cock move on his own in his pants. Those two stars were hypnotizing and Jensen blushed when he noticed that Matt was smiling at him, probably aware of where his gaze was fixed on. He danced for a while again and his hands were playing with the fabric of his underwear, when the song ended. Matt chuckled, looking at Jensen.  
  
"Well... this was fun... Happy Birthday." And with one last wink, Matt took his clothes and went out...  
  
…Leaving a very horny Jensen with an helmet on his head.  
  
"Jesus, fuck." Jensen said after a few minutes.  
  
Finally, someone was knocking at his door, so Jensen stood up and went to open it.  
  
“Are you done in here?” asked Misha “You’ve gotta help me take Jared out, that fucker broke the rules again, I will kill him.”    
  
As he said that, Jensen saw a shirtless, smiling Jared appear from the other room. “Nice meeting you too Mark.” He said while he grabbed a tee that was probably thrown at him.  
  
“Dude you are all covered in oil, glitter and hickeys, how many times do I have to tell you, don’t touch the dancers.” Misha growled as he started walking away.  
  
“I’m sorry Mish, not my problem, he started it. Oh and he may need some concealer for tomorrow.” Jared shrugged and hid behind Jensen. “So how was it Birthday Boy?”  
  
“Alright… I guess” Jensen lied, he had loved it, but he couldn’t say so to his roommates. They would make this a weekly event and for as much as he enjoyed it his body needed to rest. Misha and Jared looked at each other and said, “Well, better than the I hate it of last year, it must be a good sign.”    
  
Then Jared looked at him and started laughing “I suppose you liked it better than alright if you are still wearing his helmet. Going to give it back or..?”  
  
“No, he's keeping it,” replied Misha "Second birthday gift on the house.”  
  
Jensen sighed. He had totally forgotten to give the damn helmet back to Matt, even if the boy got all of his clothes paying attention on not leaving nothing behind, and Jensen couldn’t help but feeling like he left it there on purpose. Even if that pleased him more than it should have and in a very disturbing way, he took it off shrugging.  
  
“Yeah..it was good, happy? Now take me home.”  
  
And with that he was walking past them and getting out, not because he was extremely tired, not anymore, but he didn’t want his friends to see the blush he was sporting yet again.  
  
They walked in silence to the van, Misha was singing along to his music while Jared looked at him smiling “Mish.. Next time I’ll behave better, are you mad at me?”  
  
“No I’m not, how could I be, I know he is hot… but please; don’t leave hickeys on my strippers next time, it makes them look trashy.”  
  
“Noted, won’t happen again.”  
  
They kept talking more on the drive back. Like always Misha and Jared couldn’t spend five minutes in silence, but Jensen didn’t pay attention, as he was too busy humming one of his favorite songs, that had gotten just better.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
"Man that was a good night!" Jared said as he opened the door.  
  
"I bet it was, you kinky bastard." Misha patted Jared's shoulder and Jensen smiled a little watching them make their way to the kitchen.  
  
Jensen was exhausted and mostly horny, he was still holding the helmet in his hands and he needed to rest. Especially with all the work he would have at the hospital the following day, he could already hear Danneel bossing him around. She was nice but sometimes she could be a bitch. Anyway, bed.  
  
Jensen tried to sneak upstairs but that was before Jared's hand ended on his shoulder.  
  
"Where are you going? You need to tell us everything about Matt!"  
  
"Yep Jensen, is he good or really good?"  
  
"Guys can we do this tomorrow? 'Cause I'm really tired, okay?"  
  
They shrugged and went back to the kitchen, Jensen sighed and climbed the stairs. Their apartment wasn't that big but he could still have some privacy and that was always a good thing. He put the helmet on his bed and wondered what to do with it. Gosh... He had shivered just hearing Matt's name... No Jensen, he's a stripper, he probably does that every night. Yeah... Jensen shrugged and went to the bathroom. Yeah...  
  
He quickly stripped and walked into the shower. It could be the only thing to make him forget and relax. Well not really the only thing, but the only one he felt good about doing. He washed his hair and then quickly all the rest of his body, humming some Led Zeppelin to himself, eyes closed and smiling. After all it hadn't been such a bad night.  
  
He stepped out of the shower and didn't dry himself, then threw the towel on the floor and grabbed his tooth brush. While he was brushing his teeth he noticed that the shower wasn't good enough to get rid of the glitter. Awesome, everybody at the hospital would notice him sparkling in the morning and thinking about the glitter made him think about Matt… He looked down growling because he was hard again. Just awesome!  
  
Jensen rinsed his mouth and went back to his bedroom with the intention to lay in his bed and sleep. And that was all. He would not touch himself thinking about Matt. No, because it was wrong. And then he saw the helmet... oh yeah... right. Well... Jensen put his cotton pants on and laid down on his bed, his whole body facing the helmet.  
  
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. In his mind, Matt was above him, dancing on his bed, with the helmet on his head and that really short boxer of his. Jensen moaned as he remembered the tattoos, how bad he wanted to lick them, just to touch Matt, touch him so badly. Jensen turned his body and moved his head, moaning into the pillow. Yes, he wanted Matt to take off that underwear and grind completely naked against him.  
  
Skin against skin, and those lips, Jensen wanted to kiss those lips. His stomach was laying against the bed now and without even realizing it, Jensen went on his fours, his forehead pressed against the pillow and one of his hands found his erection. He stroked himself through the cotton pants and moaned again.  
  
"Fuck... Maaaatt…"  
  
He remembered how Matt's hips had moved and he started moving his hips too, grinding against his own palm, growling Matt's name shamelessly. In his head, Matt was touching him just like this, his mouth sucking Jensen's lips, that smirk still in place... Oh god... Jensen shoved his hands into his pants and grabbing his erect cock, he stroke himself hardly, wanting desperately to come.  
  
Jensen was leaking precum now and he couldn't stop the scream that came out of his mouth as his fingers squeezed the tip of his cock hard.  
  
"Oh yes... Matt... yes. Please."  
  
Jensen moved his hips up and down, his ass going into the air as he was fucking his own palm.  
  
"Yes, yes, yes…oh god yes… "  
  
A few hard strokes and Jensen was gone, he came hardly screaming Matt name. Oh boy... Jensen took a deep breath and rolled over, staring at the ceiling and breathing heavily. Fuck... He looked down at the mess that he made... He was pretty sure Misha and Jared had heard this but he was too busy staring down at the helmet to care.  
  
Jensen was really fucked. He needed to see Matt again.


	2. Chapter 2

The alarm clock went off, Jensen opened his eyes and stared at his ceiling for a bit, then he looked at his right and the helmet was still there, along with the pants he must had taken off at some point during the night. He stirred and walked to his wardrobe. Work day meant black v-neck and some random pants he was going to replace later with his scrubs. The loud voices of his roommates downstairs were audible and he smiled while walking downstairs to meet them, the smell of pancakes and coffee invading all of the lower floor. Jared and Misha looked at each other before they started to laugh.  
  
“Good morning to you, too! Already sugar high, awesome.” Jensen said while he was filling his mug with coffee. Unlike his flat mates he wasn’t a morning person. He just looked at them frowning while they kept laughing.  
  
“So are you going to share the joke?”  
  
Misha looked at him, and with a mouthful of pancakes mumbled “Matt and Jensen, sitting under a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g”    
  
Jensen grabbed an apple and threw it at him.  
  
“Shut up! Dumb ass. You made me do it, so don’t complain.”  
  
Jared grabbed the apple mid-air and received a pat on the shoulder from Misha “You’re welcome Mish. Jenny, we took you to get a dance, we didn’t make you…how could I say this Misha?” He looked at the other man for help and Misha more than gladly gave it to him.  
  
“What Jay is trying to say is we didn’t made you scream and grunt his name before bed time, did we? And just so you know.. It sounded like cheap European porn”  
  
Jensen practically choked on his coffee. He wasn't seeing himself in a mirror but he could bet he was red, almost purple, so he just looked down and almost whispered some excuse. The reality was he didn’t regret anything, only not taking the boy back home with him.  
  
And for sure Jensen wasn't going to apologize when Misha and Jared were laughing that hard...  
  
"You know what guys? Fuck you."  
  
"Oh no... Fuck you Jenny darling.” replied Jared, happily chewing on his bacon.  
  
"Yeah, seriously, when was the last time you got laid anyway?”, casually asked Misha, snatching some bacon from Jared's plate.  
  
"Well… I… there was this one time when I… It's none of your business okay?" Jensen finished his coffee while they laughed even harder.  
  
"Seemed to me that all work and no play makes Jensen a very horny boy." concluded Misha. "It's okay babe! Matt said he would take care of you so…"  
  
"Just shut up, okay?" Jensen didn't know why he was starting to get pissed with them. "There is nothing going out between Matt and me and… Holy shit… Is it really 9 o'clock? Oh fuck."  
  
Jensen grabbed his keys and almost ran to the door. Danneel was going to kill him.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
"What the fuck is wrong with you today Ackles?"  
  
Jensen raised his eyes from the paperwork he was actually trying to do and saw Danneel. Danneel: the gorgeous woman who was also his superior. Jensen could have dated a woman like her. Damn, he could have even married a woman like her, but sometimes she was kind of scary. Like right now, hands on her hips. He shrugged.  
  
"Sorry… I'm kinda distracted today…"  
  
"Kind of? First you're late and then you forget to check on your patients? I hope you'll take more care of this paperwork cause if Kripke complains, I'm handing him your head on a plate, okay?"  
  
"Well… okay." Jensen swallowed hard; the director of this hospital really seemed frightening.  
  
"Now tell me what's wrong before I have to guess. "  
  
Danneel sat next to him and Jensen blinked a few times, not used to the sudden change. Weird… Well… He had been thinking about Matt all morning and it wasn't a good thing… It wasn't a good thing at all… But it wasn't his fault if his mind had decided to replay him last night's scene over and over again. Fuck… It had been a long time since he'd last got laid.  
  
"Hello… Earth to Jensen? What is wrong with you…"  
  
"I… I met someone last night. A guy."  
  
"I just knew you were gay… It's always the good looking one…"  
  
"So you're saying I'm good looking?" Jensen smirked.  
  
"Don't push it Ackles… So what went wrong with that special someone?"  
  
"Well… It's been a while since I… you know… and it's been a while since I had a relationship with anyone so… I forgot how it works."  
  
Danneel offered him a smiled and patted his knee. "Trust me Jensen, I've been there. You spent the past few years studying to get what you wanted, but having a successful professional life usually means having zero personal life. Well I say fuck to that… You did work well and I have to admit that you're gonna be a great doctor, so you're allowed to have fun."  
  
"Wow… Did you just compliment me?"  
  
"Shut up and let's go get some coffee."  
  
"Yes ma'am, let's just go to the cafeteria."  
  
"Ew no, their coffee is awful, but there's a Starbucks around the corner, I'll take a Mocha and thanks for offering."  
  
Jensen laughed again and they made their way out of the hospital. Danneel was right, he deserved a bit of fun. Even if he had forgotten what it meant.  
  
Jensen liked the feeling of walking with Danneel by his side; all the jealous looks random guys sent him while they were passing by made him feel pretty good.  
As always, Starbucks was packed with people. Jensen would have gone to a smaller and less busy place but her happiness came first so he took a deep breath before holding the door open for her.  
  
“Don’t you just love when they open an other cash register and you get to skip all the line?”, asked Dan smiling while quickly walking towards it and Jensen followed her looking in his wallet for some spare change to pay. He loved Starbucks just because they couldn’t complain about all the coins he gave them.  
  
“Okay so I’ll have a tall Mocha, what about you Jen?”    
  
Jensen looked up to find himself facing, literally, his last night's wet dream, all dressed in black with green apron and baseball hat, eyes bright and cheeks flushed from the cozy temperature of the store. Damn Jensen needed a place to hide. Danneel looked at him.  
  
“Before tomorrow please, our break won’t be eternal.”    
  
Jensen sighed as he met Matt's eyes; they were so green. He eventually managed to say something.  
  
“Hmm… I’ll have a black coffee, thanks.”  
  
He quickly turned to the mints and started playing with them to avoid visual contact, but it was too late.  
  
“I can’t believe this” Matt said "You're Birthday Boy! How are you today?”  
  
Danneel confusedly looked at him “So he’s –the-boy?” she chuckled, "I’ll go wait for my coffee over there, you…yeah. Bye.”  
  
She walked away and for the first time in his whole life Jensen wished to kill someone.  
  
“So, your name is Jensen, I like it. I’m Matt but you already knew that right…” He bit his lower lip “At least I hope you remember, but if you don't it's on my name tag, so no excuses. What do you want, a tall, venti or grande?    
  
“I remembered” whispered Jensen “And a venti thanks.”  
  
“Awesome, it's 7 dollars, 'cause you are paying your friend's one too, right?” Matt said with the classical employee of the month smile, and if Jensen didn’t knew better he would've never imagined what Matt was really worth underneath all those boring clothes.  
  
“Yes, thank you.” Jensen opened his walled and took out his money, and then he grabbed five more dollars and put them in Matt’s hand. “This is for you” he smiled, but Matt turned his head to a side wincing.  
  
“ Jensen… I don’t think I deserve a tip for taking a two coffee order, but okay, thank you I will put this in our charity box if you won’t mind. Hospital children will need it more than me, after all I have more than one job.”  
  
And with that and a wink he handed Jensen both the coffees. Jensen turned around to face a smiling Danneel sitting on a little table by the window. As he walked to sit with her he felt like the biggest douche bag in the world. He and his brilliant tipping idea.  
  
"So…" Danneel stood up and took the coffee he was handing her. "This is the guy you met."  
  
"Yes… it's him."  
  
Danneel turned to the counter trying to have a better look at Matt and Jensen rolled his eyes.  
  
"Let's get back to the hospital before I get us both fired."  
  
"Oh relax Jensen… He's obviously gay for you and… oh god… Can I have a copy of your sex tape?"  
Jensen chocked on his coffee and almost fell back on the door he was holding to her. Danneel laughed before she drank her own coffee.  
  
"Just saying that with two pretty faces like that, we could… oh come on Jensen come back!"  
  
Jensen ignored her mocking and just drank his coffee. Everyone seemed to be so suddenly interested in his sex life… And it was starting to get annoying.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
Having Matt so close to him during the day was a constant problem. Well sort of. Every time he had a break, Jensen would run to Starbucks and order his coffee with a blush on his face. And every time Matt would give him his coffee with a bright smile. The same routine went on for a few days and he just ignored Danneel's advices that went from "ask him for his phone number dummy!" to "you should just bend him over the counter and fuck him!"  
  
Jensen just ignored her and at night, he kept sleeping with the helmet close to him. But it seemed that Matt was everywhere. Like when he had gone to buy some flowers for his mum, Matt was just there, helping him choose the right ones with the same pleased smile. Or when he and Jared checked out a new restaurant outside of town. Matt was there too, a shirt way too tight for him and some low jeans.  
  
It was the most casual Jensen had seen him and he was hot. Almost glowing in the restaurant, taking orders and bringing beers. And when he came to their table, he high fived Jared and turned to Jensen.  
  
"So what can I get you Jensen?"  
  
Jensen had shivered a little and fought the urge to answer "You", because it would have been embarrassing, especially with Jared in front of him. Jared had to kick his foot so Jensen could go back to reality. A reality in which Matt had some clothes on and not only his tight boxer.  
God…  
  
Jensen couldn't handle it anymore; he decided he would ask for explanations. His sanity came before these silly games.  
  
It was a Tuesday morning and as soon as the clock marked the start of his break he ran to Starbucks, hoping Matt would be there, but he wasn't. Of course, if he wanted to meet him he wouldn't find him, why in heaven hadn't he thought about it in the first place?  
  
Jensen shrugged and turned around walking away from the now crowded place. He was looking at his phone and all of a sudden was bumped into.  
  
"Oh yeah, don't mind me!" he barked out, maybe a little too upset since he hadn't found Matt.  
  
"Hmm… a little bitchy this morning Jensen, aren't we?"  
  
He looked up to find himself very close to a smiling Matt. So close he could actually kiss him if he just bent over a little more…  
  
"Sorry, did I hurt you?"  
  
Jensen shook his head, and reminded himself that he needed to be calmer and overall less bitchy with people.  
  
"Good." said Matt as he fixed the baseball hat on his head "So are you going to actually buy a coffee or what? I can make it for you, just the way you like it."  
  
And Jensen could have bet he saw a wink in there, but he was not sure, so he just nodded and opened the door letting Matt in. He actually talked to him for the first time, discovering that besides working in all the places hanging around and being very hot, Matt volunteered at the children's hospital next to where he worked and loved animals. He was pretty much the perfect man. Jensen tried not to blush while he noticed how Matt made his coffee exactly how he liked, while humming the same song he danced for him the first night. He couldn't help himself when he asked:  
  
"So what's going on? Why are you everywhere I go but I've never noticed you before?" Matt handed him his coffee and smiled.  
  
"It must be the right time." He shrugged and went on with his next costumer.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
His work shift was finally over. Jensen loved his job but sometimes it just was just too much. His legs were hurting and so was his head. Now, as he was driving back home, the prospect of having the house just for himself made him feel already much better. He parked the car noticing there was no sign of the hideous van or Jared's pick up, and he smiled. God he was a bad friend, but sometimes a man needed some alone time.  
  
He went upstairs and in two seconds he was blasting his stereo, his classic "Best of Rock" CD his sister had made for him, which had always been his favorite… Hmm, this may sound bad, but it actually was his favorite alone-time music, and no one could blame Jensen for feeling like touching himself with Robert Plant's voice in the background. And yes, the guy could have been his grand dad… But damn.. His voice was like liquid sex how could he not?  
  
Anyway there he was in his boxers and socks, singing along, already feeling much better. He looked towards his bed, and since he was a shameless human being the helmet was still there, same thing for the now oily and Matt-like smelling Pink Floyd tee. And no, he didn't wash it on purpose… Not at all. His door wasn't closed but that didn't seem like a problem since he was alone. Jensen left himself drop down on the bed. Lying, legs wide open on it, he touched himself through his boxers for a while, following the rhythm of the music, while watching the helmet, biting his lip.  
  
When he couldn't take it anymore he got rid of the boxers too and he did a very hot thing, he put the helmet on his head. There he was, naked, helmet falling a bit on his forehead, the shirt right next to him, growling as he fucked his own hand, circling the crown of his cock with his thumb to spread all the warmth of his precum.  
  
He hissed as he thought that Matt was even hotter in his Starbucks uniform, he would love to slowly undress him, then bend him over the counter and show everybody who he belonged to. He closed his eyes, moaning, trying to picture how it would feel to be inside that perfect body.  
  
"Oh..Matt".  
  
"Well, well, really caught you red-handed this time Jenny boy."  
  
All of a sudden he felt cold, he opened his eyes to find a grinning Misha popping his head inside his room and with a mobile phone in hand.  
"No, no don't stop on my account Jenny..Matt is going to love this."  
  
Jensen's eyes went wide in panic. "Damn.. Do you even know what privacy means in this house?"  
  
He tried to cover himself but he was over the duvet, so he just made himself fall off the bed.  
  
"Ohh yeah, this is a much better vision."  
  
Jensen blushed and covered his butt. "Get. The fuck. Out. Now. And if you don't erase that you'd better watch your back."  
  
Misha shrugged "You know.. It's not healthy." he looked at Jensen on the floor. "This thing you have going on.. .Not a bit."  
And with that he closed the door and went running downstairs. Two seconds later Jensen was getting up and looking for an excuse to not go back down, ever again. He could hear the loud laughter of Jared and Misha, probably watching the video. It was official: he hated them.  
  
And he had to erase that video himself before Misha did something stupid. Jensen moved quickly and put some pants on, and totally forgetting he had still the freaking helmet on, he went to the living room. There they were, his two best friends, sitting on the couch and laughing over Misha's phone. Jensen blushed a little bit when he heard his own voice screaming Matt's name.  
  
"We can make some real money here, Jay."  
  
Okay. That was it, he had had enough of these two.  
  
"Mish... Delete that video or I swear you won't have children."  
  
They both turned to him and Jensen suddenly realized he was half naked, with Matt's helmet on. Talk about confusion. Jared just laughed even more replaying the video while Misha gave him an appreciative look.  
  
"Have you ever thought of being a stripper Jen?"  
  
"Fuck you Mish." Jensen walked to them and stopped in front of the couch, hands on his hips.  
  
"Ouch... It seems our little tiger is angry."  
  
"Don't call me like that Jared, just delete that freaking video."  
  
"Fine..." Misha rolled his eyes as Jared did so and Jensen took a deep breath.  
  
"You two are the worst friends in the universe."  
  
"Oh is that so Jen?"  
  
"Yeah if it wasn't for the two of us, you would have never met Matt."  
  
"Yeah... And look where it got me... I just... It's not my fault if I'm seeing him everywhere."  
  
Jensen sighed and sat on the coffee table, suddenly really confused about all this. "Everyone is like Yeah go for it Jenny! How do I go for it? Matt is a fucking stripper for God's sake, he can have anyone he wants, someone way better than me."  
  
"Oh no Jen... We are not going over this again." Jared sat on the floor and put his head on Jensen's knees smiling. Jensen smiled seeing Jared's puppy face; which worked every time.  
"Jensen, you're a wonderful man, okay? You're funny, super good looking and you always work hard to get what you want. Matt would be lucky if he had a guy like you his life... "  
  
"Besides... He hasn't performed since your birthday." added Misha.  
  
"Thanks guys that... What?" Jensen turned to Misha, the helmet falling down even more on his face. He lifted it up, frowning to his friend. "What do you mean?"  
  
"It means that since he did that lap dance for you, he's acting like a total princess and doesn't want to strip anymore, so I gave him a few days." Misha shrugged. "I hope he comes back, he's really good."  
  
"He is." whispered Jensen, his heart racing.  
  
Matt didn't strip for anyone after him... It had to mean something right? Well, there was only way to find out. Jensen straightened the helmet on his head and asked. "Hey Mish do you have Matt's address?"  
  
"I should not do this, but if it will help you be less...like you've been lately." Misha sighed deeply and went to his room to grab his laptop. He turned it on and, while looking for Matt's address, kept talking. "I could go to jail, because privacy and blablabla… But if it's for love it's worth it."  
  
Jensen smiled, and then said. "It's not love, I barely know him and..."    
  
Jared punched his shoulder, smiling "Shut up Jen, we understand."  
  
Misha handed him a paper with the address, a grin wide on his face "So, this is it. Better find a good excuse to go there..."  
  
Jensen ran upstairs looking for something to wear. He took the helmet off, but kept it close as he decided that was going to be his excuse. It was a perfect plan. He walked downstairs to find both his friends near the door, pretending to dry their fake happy tears while hugging each other "Our Jenny grew up so fast, it seems like yesterday when he pretended to be a straight manly man… Look at him now" Jensen rolled his eyes. Those two were unstoppable.  
  
"Is the little show over? Thank you guys, really, but I need to open the door now and leave." Jared gave him the car keys and Misha proceeded to give him a big kiss on his cheek.  
  
"May the force be with you, young Tiger!".  
  
He didn't look back as he closed the door smiling, his hands shaky and sweaty. And while he waited for the elevator he heard Jared say:  
  
"Dude, ten bucks that Jenny gets laid tonight" but he was already out and to be honest he hoped that Jared was right.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
Jensen drove to a part of the town he wasn't really familiar with. All the houses looked the same to him, how was he supposed to find number 40? He was on his third round of the block when he finally saw it, it was smaller than the other houses in the neighborhood, but it looked happy. Yeah...a happy house. Jensen was hopeless.  
  
He parked the car in front of the house and after a little peep talk to himself he was stepping out of it and walking towards the porch. He could do it. He rung the bell and waited there, his best smile on his face and the helmet in his hand. This was going to be good, after all Matt stopped stripping right after. ..their thing. Jensen had hope.  
  
The door slowly opened, and instead of Matt, he found himself facing this funny looking man smiling at him, with nothing on but his underwear.  
Okay. Smile, maybe you got the wrong house.  
  
"Howdy… You'd be ?"  
  
"J-Jensen" Smooth Jensen, really, come on, speak properly you idiot. "Does Matt live here?"  
  
"Oh… You are here for Mattie? Of course the good-looking ones are never here for me. Come on in."  
  
The man opened the door to let Jensen step in. The house was messy and smelled like pie. Jensen was okay with that… The only thing uncomfortable about this whole situation was the underwear part, but the other guy didn't seem to mind and Jensen had a feeling he was doing this often. Open his house practically naked to complete strangers… Nice.  
  
"I'm Richard, but call me Rich… By the way, nice to meet you."  
"Same here." Jensen said, more to be polite than anything else.  
  
"Sorry about the mess, things here get a little bit out of hand… So how good are your X-Box skills?" Richard asked.  
  
He made his way to the living room and Jensen followed. Richard sat and Jensen turned to him, helmet still in hand. Where the hell was Matt?  
  
"A bit rusty, why?" Jensen finally answered after a few seconds of silence. He was a bit confused. He didn't want to play, he wanted to see Matt, and it was probably visible on his face because Richard shrugged.  
  
"Or you can just look at me while I play, Matt is in the shower right now, trust me you don't want to interrupt him."  
  
He stood up and pointed the mark he had just above his lower back, on his love handles.  
  
"He bit me last time… Still hurts, I probably have rabies now." He smiled and sat back down. Jensen sighed, put down the helmet and grabbed a controller. If he had to wait he could at least play and try to avoid awkward conversations.  
  
It turned out Richard wanted him to play a fighting game. Fine, Jensen could do it. He selected a random character and they started to play. Richard kicked his ass in no time at the first round and the douche even bragged about it. Oh okay... Jensen smirked and got ready as the second fight was starting. He won this one and the other two after that. Jensen turned to Richard with a pleased smile on his face, his expression screaming "Who's the boss now?", but he wasn't going to say it out loud. After all, he didn't know Richard that well.  
  
"So freaking unfair, you're good looking AND you can play. I always win this game."  
  
"Oh shut up Rich, you suck at this game and the whole world knows it."  
  
Jensen turned to the new voice and holy fucking shit... He didn't even notice when he let go of the XBOX controller that fell on the floor with a loud noise. No, he was too busy staring at Matt. Matt was walking towards them, a towel around his waist and another one in his hand as he was drying his short hair. He looked hot like this, his eyes seemed really dark and drops of water were sliding along his chest, right along his firmed and toned body and Jensen could see his tattoo slightly picking out of the towel.  
  
Fuck. Suddenly, he had forgotten his own name.  
  
Matt seemed surprised to see him at first, giving him a "Holy fuck... What are you doing here Jensen?" But then, like it was the most natural thing of the world, he sat down next to Jensen.  
  
Jensen shivered a little when Matt's wet arm came in contact with his and he realized he had his mouth open.  
  
Fuck. Talk. Say something. Anything.  
  
Jensen was just staring at Matt's chest, he wanted to lick the drops of water, especially the one on his nipple and...  
  
"The helmet!" he abruptly said. Jensen grabbed it on the floor and put it on Matt's lap. "For you." Jensen managed to say, sure he was blushing right now.  
  
"So it's him." snarled Richard.  
  
Jensen jumped a little bit at that, remembering Richard was still there. Matt threw a pillow at him, a "shut your cake hole or you'll die" look on his face. Oh... Angry Matt was a sexy Matt. But when he turned to Jensen, his smile was back on.  
  
"Let's go to my room. We can't talk with Richard here... Come on."  
  
Matt stood up with the helmet and Jensen had no choice but follow him, hoping he wasn't drooling.  
  
"Oh come on, you love me Mattie!" Richard screamed as Matt was opening the door of his room. Jensen entered, hands in his pocket as Matt replied:  
  
"Shut up! You're the reason I can't have nice things."  
  
Matt laughed and shut the door behind him. He was cute when he was laughing, his shoulders shaking. Jensen sat down on the massive bed and looked around him. Oh... He was in Matt's room, with a very almost naked Matt. Oh...  
  
"Sorry for the mess." Matt said. He put the helmet on the bed and tried to clean up a little but Jensen smiled.  
  
"It's okay... My own room is no better so… " Jensen swallowed hard and looked at the window, purposely avoiding Matt's hot body.  
  
"So you drove all the way here to give me back my helmet... Nice."  
  
Jensen turned his head and he immediately regretted it. Matt's stomach was right in front of him, he could lick it and... "Yeah. I thought you needed it back." Jensen breathed as he looked back at the window.  
  
"Oh... Jensen... Am I making you uncomfortable?"  
  
God... Jensen could hear the smirk in Matt's voice, which voice was so smooth, almost like he was rolling his tongue on Jensen's ear. Jensen shivered at that thought, blushing even more.  
  
"Oh... Let me put some clothes on then."  
  
Matt moved and Jensen thought it was safe now. Oh he was so wrong. When he turned around he was facing Matt's ass, as the latter was putting some jeans on. Matt caught his glance and smirked, whereas Jensen just stayed frozen on the bed, unable to move or turn his head again. Fuck... So not helping his fantasies.  
  
"So... better?"  
  
Matt turned back, arms wide open. And honestly, it was worse. The jeans showed his perfect and impossibly long legs, and the way the jeans were falling down his hips... Jensen could see the tattoos again, but he just nodded.  
  
"Yeah... better." Matt smiled. "I guess Misha told you.."  
  
Jensen wondered how he would finish the sentence. Has he told you why I stopped dancing? He told you what?  
  
"My address I mean, oh and Jen, can I call you Jen?"  
  
He nodded. "Y-yeah you can."  
  
"There was no need to bring this back to me… After all you don't return birthday gifts do you?"  
  
Jensen was confused as he pointed at the helmet "That was my birthday gift?"  
  
Matt threw the towel on the floor and sat next to him on the bed. "That… Between other things, you know".  
  
Jensen was sweating now and his hands were itchy with the need to touch Matt. He licked his lips and nodded again. "Yeah, I liked that."  
"Glad to hear I wasn't the only one enjoying it. So, there." Matt took the helmet and put it on Jensen's head, like he did that night "It looks much better on you anyway" and as he said that Jensen had to close his eyes, his mouth dry, nervous like he hadn't been in so long.  
  
"Thank you, but I don't agree."  
  
Matt smiled not backing off. "Well it's a shame Jen, because I really, really like it." He licked his lips and Jensen could feel the blush rising on his cheeks. The younger man looked at him like he looked at burgers, which was both sexy and scary at the same time.  
  
And Matt had practically crawled into his lap. They were so close and yet so far.  
  
"Jensen… Can I do something I couldn't to at the club?"  
  
Jensen imagined what that was so he just nodded, no way he could talk right now.  
  
"Good."  
  
Matt smiled as he crushed his lips against Jensen's. Jensen's reaction was immediate; he opened his mouth to Matt and moaned as Matt's tongue met his. He had spent days dreaming about this but he wasn't prepared. His stomach curled in the nicest way as Matt's hands were cupping his face and he moaned. Matt was an awesome kisser and his tongue was moving so slowly but with the right amount of passion that Jensen gasped in the kiss, shivering from head to toe.  
  
His hands went to rest on Matt's chest and he felt the other man shivering a bit. God yes. He finally got to touch this glorious body. God it was so good to feel strong muscles instead of curves and... Fuck. Matt was kissing him harder now. Jensen took it as his fingers were caressing Matt's chest. Matt growled as he was tracing every muscle he felt and when they had to part for air, Matt looked wild. He smiled a little, his eyes dark green now, and straddled Jensen's hips, just like he did at the club.  
  
Jensen moaned again as Matt pressed himself against him and wrapped his hands around those shoulders and... Fuck Matt kissed him again with the same devotion and he tried to moan his name, fingers tracing the muscles of his back again. When Matt moved his hips, creating a delicious friction that made them both moan; Jensen knew it was wrong. No. They were moving too fast, no, no, he didn't only come here for sex. No. He tried to push Matt and Matt parted from the kiss, a pout on his face. Adorable.  
  
"What? Don't tell me you don't like it..."  
  
As he said that, Matt licked the corner of his mouth and Jensen's eyes rolled at the back of his head . Fuck.  
  
"I... I like it... But... Are you free on Friday?"  
  
"Yes... Can we go back to the kissing now?"  
  
"Yes... But no wait, I..."  
  
Jensen shut his mouth when Matt pushed him down on the bed, a devilish smile on his face. Oh crap... No, that was not fair. Matt opened the buttons of his shirt and Jensen was just staring at him, harder than ever, want and need making everything dizzy. And once he had his shirt open, Matt let escape a happy sigh.  
  
"Better that what I pictured."  
  
With that, Matt bent over and pressed himself against Jensen. Jensen hissed and managed to say. "You... You've been thinking about me?"  
  
"God... Yes." Matt growled as their nipples came in contact and his eyes were right into Jensen's. "Jensen you're like... You're like walking sex. I mean... Jesus have you seen yourself?" Matt licked his lower lip, then moved to his neck. Jensen tried to stay still but he gave up, hands in Matt's short hair. "You're so freaking sexy Jen... You look so fine in those hospital scrubs, and your legs... Gosh your legs and the freckles on your face, and neck and... " Matt growled again and sucked his Adam's Apple. Oh boy... Jensen arched against Matt, their crotches meeting. Matt raised his gaze to him. "And you want it... Don't you?"  
  
"Yes... I mean... Could we go out on Friday? As a... " Matt's hands were playing with his nipple now, it was hard to concentrate. "As a date?"  
  
Matt stiffed out, letting go of his Adam's Apple to talk.  
  
"I'm afraid I can't."  
  
Jensen pulled him closer again, kissing his jaw. "Why? Please let me… "  
  
"No, it's just I don't do dates."  
  
"Well do you want to hang out with me then? On a Friday night? I heard you don't work anymore so please, just say yes."  
  
"I really want to but I can't."  
  
Jensen closed his eyes. "Please… Don't make me beg." Then he felt the other man's hand trailing over his stomach, he opened his eyes, gasping, just to find himself lost in Matt's green ones.  
  
"Okay, but just because it's you."  
  
"Thank you. " Jensen said while giving Matt what Jared would have called his five-years-old-smile, and with that they were lost in the kiss again. Matt moved in some spectacular way that got them both growling in unison, when suddenly a shoe hit him in the head.  
  
"What the fu-" he yelled.  
  
"Yeah I say the same, there are some things a man doesn't want to hear while playing with his x-box. Two horny mans moaning is one of them." Richard was standing in the doorway, frowning.  
Matt quickly got to the door and punched Richard. "Shut up Dick, I swear… You still owe me last month's rent, so you can't complain, I do what I want."  
  
"Just be less noisy then." He replied raising his hands in the air "or I don't know… Sound proof the love cave." Jensen couldn't help but laugh, thing that owed him a "Think he is a keeper" from a winking Richard.  
  
Matt smiled and told his flatmate to stop staring at.. his friend Jensen.  
  
Richard rolled his eyes and kept on going."Hey, hey Matt!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Remembered when I came home from grocery shopping and found that old friend of yours... What was his name."  
  
"Shut up Rich!"  
  
Richard looked at Jensen ." You want to know this, believe me." He entered the room, not minding Jensen's or Matt's semi nakedness. "This dude was called Jeffrey if I'm not wrong… so I come back from grocery shopping and this guy, is naked on my sofa!"  
  
Matt rolled his eyes "Our sofa."  
  
"Yeah whatever, our sofa, all covered in whipped cream and with this huge boner." At this point Jensen just wanted to die, but Matt and Richard thought it was funny. "So I'm like what the fuck, I'm calling the police."  
  
Matt stopped Richard and kept talking " I forgot to tell him I had a new buddy and he made him go under arrest."  
  
"Hell yeah, I want no creepers in my house. The best part, Jensen, was that the cops got here and he couldn't even dress, so they took him away with nothing but a pillow to hide his crotch and it was awesome. I bet all the convicts loved me that night."  
  
"Yeah, then he broke up with me, thank you." said Matt.  
  
"You are more than welcome, 'cause now you have Jensen. I like him better and I don't think he is a naked-on-the-sofa type of guy; look he is blushing. So cute!" Richard replied and then Matt was smiling at him.  
  
"Yes, he is."  
  
Okay, this was getting slightly embarrassing and Jensen had to get out of there as soon as possible before he made a fool of himself. And also because that was just too much information for him. He started buttoning his shirt up again and smiled as he said.  
  
"So..I'll see you on friday?"  
  
Matt frowned "No, I'll see you tomorrow at coffee break" and with that and a last kiss Jensen was out of the door, driving back to his house.  
  
Big dumb smile on his face.


	3. Chapter 3

“Hmm, it smells delicious.” said Jared while rubbing a hand on his stomach. “Can I?”  
  
Both Misha and Jensen looked at each other before letting out a single and firm “No.”  
  
He pouted and protested “Not fair, I’m starving.”    
  
“I bet, now go back to your chore” Jensen smiled, because Misha sounded like a perfect mother.  
  
"But..." Jared pouted a little as he did so. "I just want to eat... That's not fair!"  
  
"You always want to eat!" Jensen and Misha replied together.  
  
Wednesdays were the family dinner nights. All the boys had a tendency to feel homesick, at one point or another, so they came to the conclusion that having at least one night per week with a completely home made dinner was mandatory. At first they used to cook all together, each one doing one thing, but as time passed by they discovered Jared was more a eater than a cooker so he was kicked out of the kitchen area, and held in charge of decorating the dining room, thing that meant he just had to choose a cd and put the plates on the table. He was strangely fine with that solution.  
  
Misha was cutting some tomatoes for the salad while keeping an eye on the bread that was in the oven, Jensen as always was in charge for the meat, since the grill was his thing. It made him all teary eyed if he really thought about it, about how his dad had taught him all the secrets for a perfect BBQ, back in those long summer nights in which the Ackles family got together in their backyard. And even if doing this was nothing like being home, he was at home. He smiled at Misha.  
  
“So how’s that coming?”  
  
“It's done.” He said, while carefully taking the now golden bread out of the oven. “Time for the pie.” he winked at Jensen, knowing that was what he would wait for during all the dinner.  
  
“ Guys! I’m hungry! I need food!” Jared yelled from the dinning room.  
  
"Shut up you moosey freak!" Jensen yelled back with a smirk on his face.  
  
"The moose will kick you in the nuts, Jenny!" was Jared only answer.  
  
Jensen was about to reply, but Misha gave him a pat on a shoulder, rolling his eyes. “Well.. If you want raw food fine by me, and don’t you dare complain or try to say you could make it better because we don’t lie in this house. Now please go back to your chores.” he simply said to Jared. He cleared his throat and went back to cooking. And how couldn’t Jensen feel at home when Misha sounded so much like his mother? “Oh God.. He is like our kid! That’s… that’s disgusting.” Misha said while rubbing his temples.  
  
“Yeah…don’t worry I won’t talk about it. Can I tell you something Mish?”  
  
Misha looked at him and smiled “If it's about why you took the helmet back home, it took already too long.” And with that he was walking outside the kitchen with the food. Jensen could only follow him.  
  
"So what... You want to know the full story?" Jensen asked as Misha put the salad on the table. Jared tried to pick something from the plate but Misha gave him a cold glare and he sat back on his chair, pouting again.  
  
Then, with a bright smile, Misha turned to Jensen. "Fuck yeah I want the whole story... How is that even a question?! Tell us everything!"  
  
"Can we talk about Jensen's sex life AFTER dinner?"  
  
"Just ignore Mr Grumpy... Gosh Jared, I swear you sound like you're on your period when you're hungry... So Jensen, what were you saying?"  
  
Jensen laughed seeing Jared pouting again and Misha's total lack of care, and just shrugged. "Nothing to tell. He's got a weird roommate."  
  
"Oh you mean Richard... Naaa... Richard is cool."  
  
"Exactly my point Mish. If YOU think he's cool, in my book it means he's weird. But anyway... We... flirted a little and ..." Jensen took a deep breath. "We kissed and we have a date this Friday."  
  
Jensen said the last part of the sentence really quick and without meeting Misha's or Jared's eyes, he went back into the kitchen.  
  
"Wait what? Jensen!"  
  
Jensen blushed a little bit, checking the meat, and when he turned around Misha and Jared were right behind him.  
  
"What do you mean you guys kissed, is he good at it? "  
  
"Oh be realistic Mish, of course he's good, just look at how Jen is blushing right now."  
  
"God you're right, I'm sure they did more than kissing."  
  
"Yeah... I bet."  
  
"I'm sure they did, because last time I checked, Matt didn't do dates... Oh God Jensen... Did did you wallow yourself in lust with Matt?"  
  
Jensen blushed even harder at that. "Jesus christ Misha stop talking like my mum... I did ... Gosh no. We just kissed I swear!"  
  
"I believe you." declared Jared. "So a date hmm... got something in mind?"  
  
"God no..."  
  
Jensen leaned a little bit against the counter. He had zero ideas, how was he supposed to impress Matt and make him understand he was worth a date? How was he... How did normal people date anyway?  
  
"I have no idea."  
  
"Do something simple, like going to the movies !" suggested Jared patting him on a shoulder.  
  
"No! It's boring" immediately said Misha. "Hell no... be creative like.. take him to the zoo, or that new science museum outside of town!"  
  
"Misha... museums are not romantic."  
  
"Maybe not but there are plenty of darks corners and alleys… if you know what I mean." Jared laughed and they high fived while Jensen's eyes were rocking between the both of them.  
  
"Thanks for the help guys... I'll... I'll think of something, let's eat now yes?"  
  
"YES. I'm starving."  
  
"Shut up." Misha and Jensen both said at the same time... again.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
Jensen smiled at the little girl in the bed. "I'll see you tomorrow sweetheart." Then he walked out the door, the hall at this time of the day was crowded, it was visitor time.  
  
"Ackles, wait." He turned around to find his boss waving at him. He waved back and waited for Danneel to catch up with him. "Just the man I was looking for, you've done a very good job this week compared to, you know, the little lala land Jensen we had not too long ago." She smiled "I take you like your new shifts better, you should know who to thank." Danneel winked, thing that reminded Jensen that she could've been his sister.  
  
"Yeah thanks for that." He had to admit the extra hours of beauty sleep did miracles for him. "I owe you a year of coffees for that." he smiled as she flipped her hair to the side.  
  
"Exactly what I wanted, and talking about coffee how is the lover?"  
  
"Matt, he's good I guess, thanks."  
  
"Oh… so coffee boy has a name, that's a step forward. Did he tell you his name or are you just a very good creeper?"  
  
"Actually he told me, weird right?" He shrugged and then added "He also told me we have a date on Friday." Jensen kept talking like nothing happened, trying to act as he didn't already expect a reaction from his boss.  
  
"Oh… what? That's good,very good! Where are you two going?"  
  
"No idea."  
  
"Keeping secrets, mhmm no good… " Danneel shook her head, a disappointed look on her face.  
  
"No really Dan, I have no idea and I'm supposed to impress the guy."  
  
"Well…if it was me…" A big smile grew on her face, dreamy eyes that made her look like a little girl. "You had to impress I would do something along the lines of good wine, fire,cheese, french music or even better...a spanish guitar concert. Just be romantic with the capital R."  
  
Jensen looked at her trying not to laugh, after all she was still his boss "So why that look Ackles?"  
  
"Nothing… You just didn't seem like that type of girl, but it's good even if I don't think he would like that… Still it's good if some day I'll plan on taking you out." he winked trying to get himself out of a possibly awkward situation. "Well I gotta go, my next patient is waiting! "  
  
"Yeah sure… good luck with that Jen." He smiled and waved at her as he kept walking down the hall.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
As usual, Jensen was checking on some patients. He didn't mind his work those days 'cause he got to work with children and, Jensen had learned it quickly, children handle sickness way better than adults.  
  
"So how are you tonight Kristen?"  
  
The little blond girl and her mother turned to Jensen and Kristen smiled. Jensen checked her blood pressure and the usual as she answered.  
  
"I'm fine! Mum is staying tonight! We're gonna watch a movie!" She threw her arms in the air and Jensen laughed.  
  
"All right… Be still."  
  
"Listen to the doctor honey."  
  
" 'Kay."  
  
As he was doing his last tests, Jensen glanced at the clock on Kristen's mother's arm.  
  
"Holy shit… is that the time?"  
  
"Oh that's a bad word Jensen!"  
  
Her mother gave him a disproval look and Jensen winced. "I'm sorry… I didn't realize… I mean… Have a good night Kristen, I need to go."  
  
Because Jensen had suddenly remembered that he had a date and in less than 30 minutes. So yeah, he was screwed. He rushed out of the door and ran in the hallway. He bumped into Chris, another intern like him and gripped him by the shoulder. "Gotta go, please do the rest of my tour. I'll take some of your hours I swear!" With that, Jensen was running out of the hospital, patients and employees differing on his path.  
  
Somewhere along the way, Jensen could swear he had heard a "Go get him tiger!" from Danneel, but he was already out of the hospital. Looking for his… Fuck. He had left his car at home because they were renovating some parts of the hospital and he didn't want his car to get dirty because of the dirt and… Shit. Jensen kicked a bin because he had also missed the last bus. Fuck. He took his phone from his pocket. Only twenty minutes. Well… Jensen took a deep breath and started running. How could he forget about the date? How? This was important! And he didn't even have a good idea for the date! What was he supposed to do with Matt? Matt was probably expecting something great.  
  
Jensen stopped running when he came across a Chinese restaurant. Without thinking twice, Jensen got into the restaurant and bought two buckets of noodles and ran home, noodles in hands, his scrubs still on.  
  
By the time he reached his block Jensen was already used to the lack of air, let’s just say he was not as healthy as he was back in his glorious days , when he was captain of the high school athletic team… Yeah he got lazy since then and now he kinda regretted it. He reached the elevator, sweaty and breathless “Damn, how can this be so slow? I have no time for this bull… “ and there he was running upstairs, holding the food with one hand and the keys in the other.  
  
He opened the door and literally flew inside, carefully left the food on the coffee table before he turned back into wild beast mode. He got rid of his scrubs while going upstairs and he just left everything where it dropped, too late to care. “I call dibs on hot water!” he yelled before entering in the shower and quickly washing off. Approximately two minutes later he had a towel around his waist and still out of breath walked out of the bath to find Jared and Misha laying on his bed.  
  
“What the hell happened?” asked Misha.  
  
“What do you think? I got late and I had to come running. Never again dude, never again” He grunted out as he took the only towel he had to quickly dry his hair, showing off more skin than he ever had to his roommates, at least while sober. Hair quickly dried and towel thrown to the floor he took some boxers and a pair of jeans.  
  
“Are these good?”  
  
“Yeah, yeah, hate to tell you but if you came more often to run with me… You would be breathing normally by now. How do you even have sex?” he rolled his eyes at Jared and kept looking for the right pair of jeans.  
  
“He doesn’t dumb ass, and if you change jeans again I will kill you. Not only because your butt looks glorious in those ones” said Misha.  
  
“Yeah..shut up Jared, thanks Mish. Should I..?”  
  
“No, not that fucking shirt again, just.. get a clean one and some shoes, you don’t want to be late right?”  
  
“No. I don’t. Oh god, I’m going to die.”  
  
He re-started running downstairs almost completely ready, he just needed to stop in Jared’s bath for one last thing. “Jared you stole my deodorant again!” Jared shrugged as he threw it at him.  
  
“Sorry man.. You know I sweat it all out.”  
  
“Yeah.. Jared we know, come on Jenny. You look great” Misha gently pushed him to the door.  
  
“This is it cowboy, you go and get him. No buts or ifs, it will be good, smile and all that shit.”  
  
Jensen just nodded and dried his sweaty hands on his jeans, letting Jared fix his hair as he grabbed the two boxes “Oh and take this,” Misha gave him a bottle of cola “It's not champagne but it’s the best thing we have right now. Grab your car, take a deep breath. Today there is a kite flying competition in the park.”  
  
Jensen looked at Misha and with out saying anything he just threw himself at him kissing his cheek “You are a life saver, thanks.”  
  
“I know...”  
  
“Wait Jen..” He turned to Jared “Good luck man,” Jared hugged him almost crushing the food boxes. Jensen was ready to go but Jared pinched his cheek.  
  
"Jay let me go, please."  
  
"Just one last thing… here." Jared had a condom in hand and he put it in Jensen's back pocket, giving him an ass slap in the process. "Good luck."  
  
And really, Jensen was too late to blush and Misha was laughing too hard.  
  
As the door closed he heard Misha say “He will need it” and he thought that once again Misha was right.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
The drive to Matt's place was quicker than last night. Must have been because Jensen was really nervous and he didn't want to be late. And it didn't have to do anything with the fact that he drove way past the speed limit. Not at all. Anyway, the food and drinks were on the backseat and they would go to the park to eat, and watch people make their kite fly. Everything would be fine.  
  
A little less nervous, Jensen went to the porch and before he had time to say something the front door opened revealing Matt. And gosh, he was even more appealing and beautiful with clothes on. He had one of those low pants again, with boots, and a plaid shirt with short sleeves, the first buttons opened revealing his Adam's apple and showing a little bit of skin. Just enough for Jensen to want to rip his shirt off. But mostly it was the smile he gave to Jensen.  
  
"You are so late." Matt said hands on his hips.  
  
"I know and I'm sorry. I didn't know my shift at the hospital would be so long and I forgot to take my w…"  
  
Jensen's words died in his throat as Matt's hands found his waist, he pushed Jensen a little bit against the door and, before kissing him, he said "Jensen, you need to learn how to shut up."  
  
Jensen moaned into the kiss because it was hot and totally unexpected. He gripped Matt's shirt to have more and he felt Matt smile into the kiss as their tongues were brushing against each other. And it was a good thing Jensen was pressed against the door because his knees were suddenly weak and… God… He closed his eyes as Matt was deepening the kiss, his tongue doing wonderful things to Jensen's mouth and…  
  
"Jesus christ Matt there are still innocent people in his house!"  
  
Hearing his roommate's voice, Matt parted from the kiss, only to place a gentle one against Jensen's lips. Jensen blushed a little at that and they both turned to Richard.  
  
"You? innocent? Rich do me a favor and stop talking nonsense just because we have guests. Anyway, don't burn the house while I'm not here. Let's go Jensen."  
  
Jensen just had time to wave at Richard before Matt dragged him outside. And as they made their way to the car, Jensen couldn't stop his eyes from traveling along Matt's body. Just perfect. Matt must have felt it cause he turned around suddenly, and pressed himself against Jensen's car.  
  
"Gonna stare at me all night or you're gonna come and get it big boy?"  
  
"Hmmm… Just… Just get in the car please?"  
  
"With pleasure."  
  
Matt winked at him, the same wink he must have used with a lot of clients, Jensen was sure, and climbed to the passenger seat. Jensen took a deep breath and went into the car.  
  
"So…" Matt was looking all around him, curiosity on his features, green eyes opened wide.  
  
Cute, decided Jensen as he started the car. Really cute, oh, and sexy. "Where are we going? What is this all about… You know… dating? I might have forgotten a little bit and really, I think the concept is a bit overrated."  
  
"I want to say that I'll make you change your mind but… I have nothing big in store. Sorry."  
  
"Hmm… are you sure about that?" Matt was licking his lips now and he gently pressed one hand against Jensen's knee. It was nothing really but it made Jensen jump a little in his own seat.  
  
"Will you… behave while I drive?"  
  
Matt sighed and folded his arms on his chest. "Fine. But you really need to relax. And if you don't… I'll make you."  
  
Jensen swallowed hard seeing the new smirk on Matt face. He was serious.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
The parking lot next to the park was full, probably a lot of people had the same idea and that made finding the perfect spot not so easy. But mostly because Jensen couldn’t and didn't want to park his baby just anywhere even if Matt couldn’t understand that. They walked together under the moonlight, Jensen still tense about this all being late and cold food situation while Matt just smiled at him holding the cola bottle and the little blanket Jensen gave him to sit on later.  
  
"If you think we are using this, so we avoid getting dirty… You are so gay and all in the wrong way."  
  
Jensen looked at him and cocked an eyebrow. “Fine.. you sit in the mud tough guy, me and my pretty butt are staying on that gay and wrong blanket.”  
  
“Not if I don’t let you.”  
  
“What?” Jensen frowned as Matt started running on the grass. He may have damned all heaven and hell as he followed him and every muscle in his body screamed.  
  
“Here…it's perfect” affirmed Matt. “Wow, I’ve never seen all this kites flying at the same time.”  
  
Jensen made a little note to himself just to remind to buy some good wine for Misha, he practically saved his ass with this idea “Yes it is…”  
  
He sat down and patted on the blanket next to him waiting for Matt to get down. Jensen could hear his stomach rumble but as he didn’t want to push the other man on doing anything, he laid down on the grass.  
  
“What do you think you are doing Jensen? I’m starving.”  
  
Jensen smiled. “Good me too, I was just waiting for you to ask.”  
  
“You are dumb, now feed me.” Matt clapped his hands and opened his mouth “Come on I’m waiting” Jensen laughed and threw the chopsticks at him.  
  
“Today was a long day…” Jensen rolled his eyes while saying that. Really, Fridays killed him.  
  
“True, with the hospital and all that right?” said Matt around a mouthful. He had some noodles hanging from his chin but he didn’t seem to mind “Hard day today Jen?”  
  
“Yeah… I had a double shift, doing everything badly cause I was thinking about this.. Time went by so fast it passed my mind and I was late.”  
  
“Don’t worry… I may have been ready three hours ahead of time just in case, so I would have waited anyway. Thirty minutes are nothing.”  
  
“Okay.” Jensen smiled because it seemed like Matt was nervous too, he just was better at hiding it.  
  
“What about you? I guess you don’t go to college, so how was work?”  
  
“Actually, been there, done that, it was awful and I left.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Yeah… Two years of law school over here, my dad forced me into it. He wanted me to be like him, problem is I’m not.”  
  
“So you failed everything on purpose or …”  
  
“No, I had all straight A’s, proud parents and all that, but I wasn’t happy. So boring. I couldn’t even smile… It was sucking the life out of me.”  
  
Jensen sighed. He couldn’t imagine a non smiling Matt. “Well you are good now.”  
  
“Yeah apart from the don’t bother coming home for Christmas thing, I’m awesome.”  
  
“Oh shit... I’m sorry, that sucks.”  
  
“It did the first two years or so, then I met Richard… He is like the brother I’ve never had. I have him, a roof and food. I need nothing more.” Matt casually said, still eating. Jensen was impressed he couldn’t have guessed Matt had all those different faces, and he liked them all. "So this is not a monologue, sorry… I don’t even know why I’m telling all this to you.”  
  
“Oh… I’m used to it, my face tends to make people want to talk." Jensen could feel a shiver down his spine as Matt got rid of the distance between them.  
  
“Well, your face makes me want to kiss you…all the time. But that’s just me.” Matt whispered, really close now.  
  
Jensen gulped. ”Yeah… Only you.”  
  
“So are we supposed to do date things now, like you say bad jokes and I laugh, or..?”  
  
“No… We could fly a kite but we don’t have one so we have to sit here and watch.”  
  
“Or not… Look, this is how you do it.” Matt said with a predatory smile as he stood up, while Jensen wondered what he was doing and where he was going. Until, no… He wouldn’t do that, please not a kid. He did. Matt came back running, kite on his hand and a bright smile on his face. “Jensen! Look! We have a kite now!" He jumped and started to run letting the kite fly behind him.  
  
Jensen rolled his eyes and stood up. Hands on his hips, he was looking at Matt. “Are you crazy? Give it back now! It’s a kid’s kite… How are you even human?”  
  
“He gave it to me…”  
  
“He is crying”  
  
“He’s dumb… I said give it to me for ten minutes.”  
  
“And you took it?”  
  
“Yeah..but I asked.”  
  
“Damn…Matt you can't just… anyway… ” Jensen could hear Matt laughing as he walked towards the child. “Sorry kid… he's … He's… just special.”  
  
“You mean he’s retarded?” the kid said, trying to be mean in a way only kids can be.  
  
Jensen frowned a little. “No..more like he is… Nevermind, here, have this, should pay for it.” He handed ten bucks for the kite and left him smiling there looking at his new treasure.  
Jensen made his way back to their spot, sat down on the blanket and looked at Matt acting like a clown for him.  
  
At some point  the speakers started blasting some pop music, and Matt took it as his cue to start dancing but it just resulted in him stepping on a dog and the kite flying away. “And that…was fun.” Matt said while still laughing, but suddenly he stopped and moved into Jensen crushing his lips on his.  
  
Jensen was still half laying on the grass and he didn’t plan on moving anytime soon when Matt so sweetly held his head up for him and laid next to him, never breaking the kiss. It was a nice kiss, long, sweet, as they were both laying down on the blanket.  
  
"Been waiting this for a long, long time” whispered Matt against his lips.Jensen didn’t reply he just licked his way into Matt’s mouth, after all he didn’t want to miss anything that delicious just to talk. But he eventually talked when they both had to part for air.  
  
“You should start making first steps… Like, kiss me, all the time, when you want.”  
  
Matt chuckled, his Adam's apple shaking in the process.“Because you want to do that, right?”  
  
Jensen just licked the corner of Matt's mouth.“What do you think?” And with that, Jensen climbed on top of Matt, settling himself between his legs and kissed him a little bit deeper this time. Matt moaned in his mouth and his hands travelled all along Jensen's back and going slowly to his ass. And, surprise on his face, Matt parted from they kiss.  
  
“What is this Jensen?” he said as he took his hand out of Jensen’s back pocket. "A condom! Really… so you think I'm that easy, right?” Matt laughed while Jensen froze on a top of him.  
  
“No… I mean… I don’t… that’s not mine.”  
  
“Well, that’s a shame because I am. And I was hoping this was yours.” Matt mumbled as he started kissing Jensen’s neck. “I have some of my own…I went for big, hope you won’t let me down.” Matt had a smirk on his face and he used his strength to flip them over, straddling Jensen hips. He sucked Jensen's ear and Jensen moaned, louder when he felt Matt's hands going underneath his shirt, to his zipper and…  
  
“M… matt…slow down, public. Kids. Families”  
  
“I don’t care.. I just want you.” Matt growled before he sucked his bottom lip. Shit. That was hot. But no, Jensen needed to be strong, so he pushed Matt a little.  
  
“Same back at you, but not here.”  
  
“Then let's leave.”  
  
“Sure… Wait, I just…” Jensen was pulled up by strong hands.  
  
“No waiting. Now Jensen.”  
  
And really, it was Matt's tone that made Jensen collect their things and follow him to his car. His bossy tone was really sexy and it was doing wonderful things to Jensen. Really. But mostly, Jensen couldn't help but wonder how it would feel to have Matt beg for him to fuck him with that same voice... God... He was so damaged. However, Matt couldn't help but touching him, he pinched his ass as Jensen put the blanket back in the trunk of the car and kissed him quickly, shoving Jensen slightly against the car, and finally, finally, he let Jensen get inside the car, so he could drive.  
  
But Jensen was too horny to focus on the road and he could feel Matt's eyes on him. His small touches had broken something deep inside of him and suddenly, he remembered that it had been a long, very long time since he had sex. Since he had done something more than kissing. Fuck, Jensen thought as he finally started the car, way too long.  
  
"So… My place or yours?" finally said Matt, breaking the thick silence between them. But it was electric, just like when Matt suddenly moved in his seat, leaning close. His fingers played with the fabric of Jensen shirt and Jensen glanced at him. Fuck.  
  
Road. Now, you dumbass, or you're both going to die.  
  
"Well… Unless you want to give Misha and Jared a private show, I suggest your place."  
  
"Yeah… I bet those fuckers would like that very much… But I don't mind, I'm used to people watching." Matt added with one long laugh.  
  
Jensen growled a little bit, eyes still on the road. Lucky for him, he had to stop the car because of the traffic so he could turn to Matt. "I don't like sharing." He admitted slowly.  
  
"I'm sure you don't honey." Matt kissed him, or more like he played with his lips, licking and sucking them. Jensen moaned at that, totally giving him and forgetting where they were. "Such beautiful lips." whispered Matt. He finally kissed him, his mouth playing with Jensen's, both of his hands on the older man's face. Gosh Jensen needed that mouth somewhere else… This delicious, talented mouth and… fuck… Jensen leaned back in his seat when Matt moved his mouth to his jaw, then his Adam's apple and… Fuck.  
  
It was like Jensen's body reacted on his own, knowing exactly what he needed the most. Soon Matt was lifting his shirt up, as far as he could, and he waisted no time to bite one of Jensen's nipple. "Fuck… Matt." Jensen opened his eyes at the sensation and he suddenly remembered where they were. In his car, stuck in the traffic. Oh no… wrong. Wrong. Matt must have noticed the sudden change because right at that moment, his tongue moved on Jensen skin, lapping every corner he could reach.  
  
Jensen moaned again, attempting to move, to speak or say something coherent as Matt's tongue was all over his chest. Licking his tanned skin, trailing saliva all over it and making Jensen shiver every fucking time he would discover a new part of his chest. "Matt… Matt… Jesus … Matt… You need to stop… Please… God… Just… People will… Matt."  
  
Matt growled, still licking and when he reached Jensen's jeans he looked up. "Do me a favor Jen, shut the hell up. Oh and keep screaming my name." Jensen was about to say that his two orders didn't make any sense at all, but Matt grabbed his cock through his jeans and Jensen jumped on the seat, a low "Maaatt" escaping him. Matt smirked and next thing Jensen knew, his jeans and underwear were pushed down to his knees. His erect and slicking cock was for Matt to see.  
  
"Gosh Jensen… Soon I'll have you naked and ready to fuck me, but until that…" Matt, still looking predatory, leaned in to his cock and grabbed it with both hands. Jensen shivered again at that and one of his hands clung to Matt's shoulders. Matt looked at him still with that devious smile and he played with his cock, brushing the tip all over his lips. Fuck… That sight made Jensen moan even more, the feeling of his wet tip against those soft lips was just incredible.  
  
Matt repeated the motion and soon, Jensen tried to moved his hips, trying to push it between those lips, just a bit more and… "Oh… fuck…" Matt, that playful bastard, had suddenly opened his out, swallowing a lot of Jensen's cock in the process. He moved his head up and down quickly, sucking on the flesh he had in his mouth like a fucking professional. That thought turned Jensen on even more and he screamed when his cock twitched inside of Matt's mouth. That wet heat was just perfect against his hard cock. Oh so long… So fucking long…  
  
Matt went down on him again, taking more this time, inch after inch, relaxing his throat in the process and Jensen screamed again seeing his mouth being stretched to the limit just because of his cock. Fuck, he gave up at having any control on this and one of his hand ended on Matt's head. Matt moaned appreciatively, the sound vibrating around Jensen's cock, and they were both moaning when Jensen urged Matt to take more. "Yes… just… Yes… Gosh Matt you just feel fucking perfect… Please don't fucking stop."  
  
As he begged, Jensen kept his grip strong on Matt's hands and Matt didn't stop. Oh no he didn't, he kept going up and down, this time, all Jensen's cock between his lips, and he moved, fucking his own mouth. Jensen growled and raised his hips as much as he could, following the motion. "God.. yes… take it… Just… fuck…" Jensen looked down, seeing how his cock would slid perfectly into Matt's mouth, how Matt had his eyes closed, breathing with his nose, spit drooling on his jaw. Gosh… That was fucking hot, and Jensen was close. "Matt… you better fucking move now or…"  
  
Or Jensen never got to finish his sentence cause he came, hard and panting, right inside of Matt's mouth. "Shit… S.." He was about to apologize and let go of Matt but Matt surprised him by sucking him harder, taking everything he had to offer. "Oh my… fuck…" Jensen kept on moaning as Matt retreat, but Matt lapped him clean before he sat back again, wiping his mouth.  
  
"So… That was amazing and we need to do it again… And you should drive! What are we still doing on the middle of the road?"  
  
Jensen licked his lips “Uh… Yeah… Driving, right. No the traff… “ He couldn’t even make up a coherent sentence when all he saw were Matt’s pink and shiny lips, his satisfied smile as he cleaned his chin with the back of his hand.  
  
“You are amazing.”  
  
Matt rolled his eyes. “Said the guy that just got a blow job.” he leaned in to kiss Jensen’s cheek, but he was too slow, so Jensen turned around to catch his lips and kiss him, gently tasting himself on his tongue. Jensen looked at the other man smiling. Matt looked down and proceeded to tuck Jensen in, then he patted on his leg “Guess this car is full of awesome then.” Jensen turned on the radio, looked by his side and he could have bet that the pink tone on Matt’s cheeks was a blush. He didn’t say a word about it.  
  
He took Matt home and parked the car and it took longer than it should have to get out of it, and he blamed Matt’s kisses. He really, really didn’t wanted to leave Matt, not now, not ever, so he just pressed him against the door “So…think I can com… “  
  
The door opened suddenly making Matt fall backwards, sitting on the floor as he looked up at Richard “What the hell man…“  
  
Richard got him up by his shirt and pointed a finger at Jensen. “What are you planning young man? My daughter will wait to get married, this is not acceptable. Go away before I call the police” He winked at Jensen just to make sure he knew he was playing. “And you… Do you think this is a reasonable time to come back home? Want me to die? You want that.. He could have raped you.. He almost did.”  
  
Matt was now up and laughing “My precious daughter, don’t do this again to me. Never again” Richard placed some fatherly kisses on Matt’s cheeks making sure they were really noisy, then he walked out “Kiss him goodbye and close the door darling.”  
  
And so he did.  
  
—————

  



	4. Chapter 4

As the days passed, Jensen realized that dating Matt was ... easy. Surprisingly easy. Matt would often tell him to relax before stealing him a kiss, usually in front of everyone, and Jensen had blushed like a little girl when Matt, in his Starbucks uniform, had leaned against the cash machine to give him a big kiss, all the customers watching them. Jensen could still hear Danneel's laugh in the back of his head because, of course, she was there that day, but he had just smiled before rushing out with his coffee in his hand.  
  
Jensen was shy and he didn't do that kind of things, but then again, Matt was making him do a lot of new things. For instance, Matt made him go to the gym with him, saying Jensen could use some exercise. Jensen ended up sweaty and tired, but, lucky for him, Matt and him made out pretty heavily under the shower. And there was nothing like pushing Matt against a wall and kiss him, their wet bodies pressed against each other, his mouth swallowing every sound Matt could make while his hands were traveling on Jensen's ass.  
  
Matt made him go to the zoo, and there he acted like a total child, imitating every animal to make Jensen laugh. And off course, Matt got along well with Misha and Jared. He had totally crashed on of their family night by making them some sushi. At first Jensen and Jared had been against it because they were Texans, which meant meat, but the food was awesome and Matt had sucked Jensen's cock again that night so... So it was worth eating sushi.  
  
Yeah, speaking of sex, they didn't move any further than blow jobs and hand jobs and, oh, sweet and wet kisses. Jensen knew Matt wanted more, that he was ready for more, but at the same time, he didn't push Jensen and sometimes, after a hot making out session, he would just make himself small, his strong body fitting perfectly against Jensen. Yes, Matt was ready for more. And Jensen? He just didn't know anymore. Matt was probably used to great, sweaty and amazing sex... And Jensen was used to jerking himself off when he had the time. He had spent so much time focusing on his work that he had forgotten his own pleasure. But he wanted Matt... badly.  
  


♦♦♦

  
  
Jensen took the phone from his back pocket. Technically it was forbidden to have it during the shifts but he didn’t want to miss any spicy text from Matt or… his mom calling. Yeah he had his reasons, still he didn’t expect to be Misha the one calling him, he imagined it was for some stupid reason and hung up.  
  
But then he called again so Jensen answered. “Hey, what’s up?”  
  
“Where are you?” he could hear obvious annoyance in Misha's voice.  
  
“ ‘m at work, where I’m supposed to… “  
  
“It's Wednesday, we are waiting!”  
  
“But its not even… “  
  
Jensen practically felt Misha’s eyes roll “No, you don’t understand… You are late, we are never late for dinner on Wednesdays. Be here. Fast.” And Jensen couldn’t reply because Misha had already hung up on him.  
  
He felt guilty, first of all because Misha was right, they were never late on Wednesdays and even if the hospital clock, his phone and watch told him he still had thirty minutes before his shift was over he walked to Danneel’s office and asked if he could leave before his due time. She gave him a “Leaving early again Ackles… If only I could not like you.” and said yes, she always did. Jensen thanked the Lord for that as he got in his car and drove, faster than he should had, but he was late.  
  
And it was Wednesday. Can’t be late on Wednesdays.  
  
As he got outside of the elevator he had a bad feeling about this, as if something wrong had happened. If he was late and they were waiting for him, why wasn’t the stereo blasting some bad music? Why couldn’t he hear Jared’s laughter or some kind of noise? It was too quiet for everything to be good, and that scared him. Before starting to freak out he decided to open the door. After all there was no use in panicking, maybe Misha just had a headache…or a hangover.  
  
Jensen opened the door and found himself in a semi dark house. The light was off, it was dark except for all those candles on the floor, shadows dancing with the movement of the fire, making figures on the walls. He frowned and whispered to himself “What the hell?” maybe Jay forgot to pay the light bill again… And that could explain why Misha was mad. He walked inside and closed the door behind him. He hung his jacket and noticed a little note, a post it -Guess who?-he smiled. Oh so this was a prank. Not cool, he skipped work for this.  
  
Jensen smiled and took his shoes off before following the trail of candles that led him to the stairs. He bit his lip as he noticed another post it -Why are you still here? Ps. Follow the damn candles.- By now Jensen kinda had an idea of who and what it could be but… No,  _he_  wouldn’t. When he reached the top of the stairs he noticed everything was in the darkness apart from his room. The door was half opened and a soft light came from inside.  
  
Jensen knocked on the door just in case before stepping in. All of a sudden his knees felt weak, his cock hardened a little bit in his pants, because it fact, it was who he thought could be, and yes he did all of that.  
  
The vision of a very naked Matt on his bed smiling, head rested on his hand, made his own head spin “Took you so long…” he looked at Jensen “I’ve been freezing, come here. But before get rid of those scrubs…. You won’t need them.” Matt was just stunning in this semi darkness, his long and strong body laying on  _his_  bed, just for Jensen to take and do as he pleased. And Matt was already hard, his cock already erect from need, hardening a little bit more because Jensen was in the room.  
  
Jensen smiled and quickly got out of his clothes. He needed to touch Matt, he needed that skin against his, like, immediately. “You are crazy…” He climbed onto his bed and kissed Matt's lips “How did you even get rid of Misha and Ja… “ Matt obviously didn’t want to talk about that so he decided to shut Jensen up with a kiss. Jensen looked at Matt again, he was closer this time, so he noticed the last post it -SURPRISE !!-. He took it off and shook his head before pulling Matt down on the mattress and kissing him breathless.  
  
They moved slowly as they kissed, the only sound in the whole room, and probably the whole house, was their bodies moving against the sheets and their lips sliding against one another. Matt spread his legs for Jensen, letting him settle between them, but Jensen didn't press all his weight on Matt. He wanted this to be slow, he needed this to be slow so he could discover every aspect and every part of Matt's body. And worship it.  
  
His own cock moved a little more at that thought and Matt growled, his hands on Jensen's face as he moved his hips. No. Jensen grabbed both of Matt's arms and pinned them to the bed. "Oh… So we're rough today, uh?" Matt asked as he kept moving his hips, desperate for some sort of contact. "I like that… " He gasped when their cocks brushed against each other. "I like that a lot."  
  
"No…" Jensen growled the word, using all the self control he had left."You need to behave or you won't get anything." As he said that, Jensen broke their embrace, slowly going away from Matt.  
  
"No, no, no, no… I'll behave I swear don't stop." Matt was on his elbows now, and Jensen smiled.  
  
"Good."  
  
He bent over again and kissed Matt. Slowly this time. He was glad Matt didn't try to touch him but on the contrary, accepted the kiss, his lips moving in rhythm with Jensen's. Gosh… Matt always tasted like coffee and it kinda drove Jensen crazy. He licked both of his lips, making the other man shiver, then the corner of his mouth, then his jaw. Jensen made his way to Matt's Adam's apple very slowly, trailing his skin with wet kisses and gentle touches of his fingertips.  
  
And as he sucked his Adam's apple, Matt pushed his head back against the cover, looking perfect and beautiful. Hmm… Jensen needed to do that again. He sucked again and again, until Matt was whispering his name, his hands gripping the sheet tight, biting his lower lip, doing everything he could not to move. Jensen smiled and kept going. He traced his collarbone with his tongue with special care. He just loved the way everything was big, sharp and defined with Matt's body. His hands came in the way when he finally reached his chest, he pinched one of his nipples while taking one in his mouth.  
  
"Fuck… Jensen… You fucking tease… Gosh I hate you… so… much." Matt managed to say between pants.  
  
"No you don't babe, so shh… let me take care of you."  
  
"Just… Fuck! Jensen!"  
  
Jensen just bit his other nipple, the same one his fingers had played with and he smiled when Matt's whole body shivered underneath him.  
  
"And that's just the beginning babe, gonna make you feel so good…"  
  
"Do not call me… hhhnnng…"  
  
Jensen bit his nipple harder this time, his hands tracing Matt's muscles. "Hmmm… Sorry what was that?"  
  
"Fu…. Jensen"  
  
Jensen smiled and left Matt's nipple, making his way down, biting and lapping. Apparently, Matt was not used to someone being this gentle with him. But Jensen didn't break his rhythm, he didn't want to loose any of that just because he was eager and Matt felt delicious underneath his tongue, salty and bitter. Matt was sweating when Jensen finally reached his navel and he collected the drops of sweat with his tongue, moaning in the process.  
  
Jensen was probably sweating too, but he was too focused on Matt to care about himself. He raised his eyes to the other as he sucked his left hipbone, taking the sharp angle in his mouth, and wrapping his lips around it with passion… Matt had his eyes closed and his forehead was covered in sweat, the muscles of his arms flexed while he was holding on to the sheet like his life depended on it. Jensen sucked his hipbone from top to bottom and he felt Matt hard on against his own skin.  
  
"Jensen please… please… just stop… stop the teasing and fuck me."  
  
"Hmmm…" Jensen ran his tongue across the skin just right above Matt's cock. "No!"  
  
"Jesu… just quit playing just… When was the last time you had sex anyway? Just fuck me."  
  
"Behave Matt."  
  
With that Jensen completely ignored Matt's hard on and spread his legs open even more, hard hands on his thighs, lifting them in the air. He had a sneak pick of Matt's hole, just there, begging to be touched, begging to be worshipped too. Jensen growled and put Matt's legs on the bed, knees bent.  
  
"Stay like that."  
  
His hands grabbed Matt's ass cheek hardly and they both moaned at the contact. Jensen didn't stop there, he opened Matt for him, feeling his cock move again when he saw the pink and shinny rim, just waiting for him to…  
  
"Holy mother of god… Jensen!"  
  
Jensen ran his tongue over Matt's hole again, enjoying the unique taste, and Matt arched on the bed for him. He repeated the operation again, running his tongue all over the rim, making it wet.  
  
"Jensen… fuck… just don't tease again, just…"  
  
Jensen knew what Matt wanted, he didn't waste anymore time and went for it, he pushed his tongue inside of Matt's rim and moaned, as his ass was swallowing his tongue, tight and hot around it.  
  
"Fuck… yes, yes, don't stop, please just…"  
  
Jensen wasn't planning on stopping soon, he got his tongue in, then out, fucking Matt with it in very quick movements, needing to have more of that taste on his own tongue. More, just more of Matt, and he was so tight and hot and perfect around his tongue. Jensen couldn't wait for his cock to be inside of him. He quickened the pace thinking of that and he didn't stop when one of Matt's hands found his way to the back of his head, Matt's hips rolling as he fucked himself on Jensen's tongue.  
  
Yes. Yes. Jensen gave it to him, hard and fast now, licking his insides in the most illicit way and Matt kept screaming his name, begging for more. No. Jensen wanted him to come just because of his tongue first, just his tongue, and then he would give him what he wanted. Jensen took his tongue out and wrapped his lips around the hole his time, sucking it, like he could have done with Matt's lips. That was all it took, Matt broke above him, coming all over his own stomach.  
  
"Jesus… just oh God… Oh God…"  
  
Jensen stood up, crawling back onto Matt, who was smiling and looking at the come on his own chest and then up at Jensen, body still shivering. Jensen leaned to his ear and whispered. "Told you I was going to make you feel good. Now you're gonna turn over and I'll make you come again."  
  
Jensen didn't give him any chance to reply, he pulled Matt up against him, pressed them together, both kneeling on the bed now. He was still lightly shaking as Jensen kissed him and smeared his cum over his stomach, both moaned into the kiss until Jensen parted from it. Jensen licked his lips before leaning over Matt’s ear and whispering “Don’t move”.  
  
He got off the bed, trying not to knock down any candle, the last thing he wanted was a fire. He reached his desk and opened a drawer, smiling back at Matt as he walked back to him, lube and condom in hand. “Stay just like this.” Jensen said as he positioned himself behind Matt, nibbling on his ear, teasing him but mostly enjoying what he waited so long for, he slowly started kissing and suckling his way down Matt’s back, his cock twitching at every moan that escaped his lover's lips.  
  
“Such pretty sounds…all for me.” Jensen murmured before licking all along Matt’s spine, going back up to reach his ear again.  
  
“P… please…Jen”  
  
“Shhh…” Jensen silenced him by slipping two fingers between his lips, making them wet. He moaned as Matt captured them in his mouth and made obscene sounds, making sure Jensen got the idea of what he wanted. Then Matt let them go and tilted his head back, closing his eyes, silently giving to Jensen all the power. Jensen quickly got it, he hissed as his cock got in contact with the skin of Matt’s back who was now shamelessly rutting against him. ”Still…”  
  
Matt was still open from before, so Jensen quickly opened the lube and covered his own fingers with it, quick and precise. Then, he pushed them against Matt's entrance, they slipped in easy, and he grunted against Matt's neck, his other hands on his hip, eyes watching how Matt's ass was swallowing his fingers.  
  
“Mhmm… Can’t wait to be inside you” Jensen growled as he pushed deeper, making them both moan because Matt was so tight and perfect against his fingers as they were stretching him open.  
  
"Oh god Jensen yes..." Matt's moans were low and guttural now and he fell back onto the bed, he was on his fours now and moved his hips and his ass trying to have more. Jensen stopped his fingers and watched how that tall and strong body moved, how the muscles of his back would flexed covered in sweat, how Matt's ass seemed to enjoy the pressure of his fingers.  
  
Jensen had stopped moving and Matt was fucking himself on his fingers, apparently needing no help. Fuck. "Jesus Matt... You really want this don't you?"  
  
"Told... You." Matt managed to say, he turned his head a little, pelvis still going up and down.  
  
And that was it, Jensen needed to be as close as possible to him. Immediately. Matt let escape a broken sound as Jensen pulled out, but he smiled a little, apparently still exhausted from his first orgasm, as Jensen opened the condom and put it on. Jensen hissed a little because, damn, he was hard, and covered his own cock with lube, stroking a little. Matt licked his lips at the sight and Jensen decided that Matt, on his fours, rim pink and wet and open, covered in sweat, was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.  
  
He grabbed Matt's hips with one hand and with the other, he guided his cock slowly to Matt's entrance. As much as he wanted that, he was still serious about doing this slow and being passionate. The first push inside of Matt was a slow burn and it made them both moan. Matt stood still apparently understanding Jensen's need to be slow. Oh yes, so slow it seemed almost unreal but there he was, going deeper and deeper inside of Matt, his length being swallowed whole by the pink rim he had licked earlier. Oh fuck...  
  
Jensen pushed himself all the way in, in one quick movement, and Matt shivered underneath him, his whole body making room for Jensen. “Jen…now please.” pleaded Matt, his voice more low than usual, his grip on the sheet stronger than ever, he was probably going to rip them. He tried to move but Jensen held him by his hips. No moving until he decided it was time. Jensen waited a few minutes, enjoying the heat coming from Matt's ass and how his body was getting relaxed by the second. And then... He moved.  
  
Slowly, he followed a steady rhythm, focused on brushing his cock into all Matt's insides, breaking every wall of resistance. Each thrust was low and made of pure torture and made Matt growl against him. Matt tried to move, doing everything to get more friction, but Jensen held him there, fucking him slowly, passionate and yet not deep enough. "You have no idea how you feel against me Matt" Jensen whispered those words as he kept going inside of him, still slowly, still torturing the both of them. "I wanted to do this since the first day I met you... Gosh you feel so perfect around me." Jensen loosened his grip and allowed Matt to move, the latter screamed as he quickened the pace, meeting Jensen's cock halfway.  
  
Matt dropped his head down as he pleaded “Please…” he tried to move against Jensen looking for more friction, more everything, he just needed more. “Please.. Let me have…" Jensen silenced him with a low chuckle, enjoying every second of Matt's struggling. The way he would twist his neck, almost hurting himself, just so he could look at Jensen, how his hands were almost red as he held on to the bed, how drops of sweat would roll all along skin, Matt looking wild into this light.  
  
"You think it's funny… torturing me like this?" Jensen actually really enjoyed the feeling, just another wave of pleasure adding to the mix of skin against skin, his cock trapped deep inside Matt. He was driving both of them crazy, crazy with need, want and sweat. Jensen leaned down, hands moving on Matt's skin, caressing him and trying to learn more from it.  
  
"Come here." His voice was a whisper against Matt's skin, a secret all along his spine, making him shiver again. Then, Jensen pulled Matt against him, his chest pressed against his back, more sounds coming out from both of their mouths. In that new position, Jensen could thrust deeper and deeper inside of Matt's glorious body. Matt pulled his head back against Jensen’s shoulder, who licked a strip along his neck and smiled against it.  
  
“How do you want it baby?” Jensen asked in a low tone against him as he rolled his hips. “Like. This?” He punctuated each word with a hard thrust, his cock going inside hard and perfect, trapped so deep and so far, he had managed to reduce Matt to nothing but moans, growls and cries. Jensen licked the corner of his mouth, one arm around Matt's waist, the other still on his hips, and he fucked him. Hard and fast. Just how Matt wanted it.  
  
He wasn't so gentle anymore and he gave Matt exactly what he needed, licking his mouth every time he moaned. He even bit Matt's exposed neck and kept ponding and ponding inside of him, quick, precise, never stopping or breaking the rhythm. Always giving the right amount of passion, the right amount of strength. Because Jensen had always been a giving lover, he was far more interested in Matt's pleasure than his own.  
  
Matt opened his mouth as he was going deeper again, no sound coming out because he was too far gone. His green eyes were into Jensen's and the other knew he was close. Matt tried to grab his cock but Jensen stopped him. "No. Coming from my cock inside of you. Just me. Only me." He sucked Matt's earlobe and kept on going, the bed making lousy cracks underneath them now, but Jensen was too focused to notice and Matt too… too out of control to care.  
  
The younger man moaned, his hips moving, his own cock thrusting into the air and just like that, absolutely stunning and beautiful, he came for the second time. Jensen growled, feeling the sudden tightness around him as he was fucking Matt throughout his orgasm. Matt kissed him hard, his hands gripping Jensen's, and let himself be fucked by the other man. Gosh… Jensen couldn't take more, three long hard thrusts and he was gone, emptying himself in the condom. He let go of Matt and the latter fell into the bed moaning, eyes half closed. Jensen took off the condom and threw it to the bin before he did the same, falling next to Matt.  
  
Matt moved slowly, chest moving as he tried to catch his breath, and he opened his eyes, looking at Jensen. They were face to face, foreheads pressed against one another. "You were… amazing… Gosh… I hate you for being good at every fucking thing." Matt's voice was a raspy whisper, too tired and too sore now.  
  
"Trust me, it's only because of you."  
  
"Good… Don't plan on sharing anytime soon."  
  
Matt found his way inside of Jensen's arms, apparently not caring about the sweat, cum and the sheets between them. Jensen smiled, closing his eyes for the first time and wrapped one arm around Matt's waist. "Good."  
  


♦♦♦

  
There was a soft light coming from the window, Jensen thought he must had forgotten to close his shields again, he turned around, to face the opposite direction. Still with his eyes closed and half asleep he noticed there was something wrong with his bed, something different. Not bad,just different, much firmer and warm… and Matt.  
  
Jensen felt something tickle his nose and opened his eyes to find Matt snooze against him. His head was just under his, his forehead was just in front of Jensen’s mouth, he kissed it, smiling. Jensen loved waking up like this, he stirred trying not to wake Matt up, but he failed. “Hey” Matt looked up at him, eyes still half closed but greener than usual, his voice rough, not the same type of rough Jensen heard the night before. Now it was soft and sleepy.  
  
“Good morning” Matt whispered.  
  
“Hmmmm… Good morning, slept well?”  
  
Matt nodded and pulled himself up to kiss Jensen’s lips. The kiss was slow and soft, just their lips brushing against each other and Jensen moaned at the contact. He was slowly waking up and realizing he was very naked and so was Matt, settled in his arms.  
  
“Very good… You are comfortable.”  
  
“Yeah.. Tell that to the arm I will have to amputate”  
  
“What?” Matt frowned and Jensen thought he was even cuter when dopey. “You slept on it all night… I can’t feel it.”  
  
Matt smiled. “Well can you feel this?” He said as he ran his hand along Jensen’s morning wood. Jensen hissed and closed his eyes, his whole body giving in to Matt's small touches.  
  
“Sure do.”  
  
“Good.”  
  
Matt kissed him again as he slowly started to move his hand along the length of his shaft, and he kept stroking him softly, both of them still sleepy sharing lazy kisses. Jensen sucked his breath “Please..I’m ..Matt” he didn’t need to say more, the touches became quicker, the hold firmer, Matt ran his thumb around the head of Jensen’s cock smearing the precum everywhere, making them both sticky and wet.  
  
Matt started loosing his rhythm as Jensen began moaning and making all kind of sweet sounds agains his lips and Matt gently swallowed them all. Jensen tilted his head back, coming with a loud moan. They kissed some more, Jensen with a smile on the corner of his lips. When they parted, Jensen finally opened his eyes and they went wide as Matt took the hand to his mouth, licking the come off it “W…what are you doing?”  
  
“Having breakfast.”  
  
Jensen laughed and sat up. “You are such a dumb ass, come on, time to shower. "  
  
To Jensen's surprise, Matt behaved under the shower. They had brushed their teeth in complete silence, Matt smiling like one happy kid, Jensen looking at his reflection in the mirror. He just couldn't believe all of this was happening to him, that Matt was happening to him. Anyway, they stepped into the shower after more kisses, Matt sucking his bottom lip like only he knew how to do it. Just the right way to make Jensen shiver and grip the sink to not loose his balance.  
  
The water felt amazing on Jensen's skin and he wasn't surprised to hear Matt moan next to him. He grabbed the soap and without even thinking twice about it, started running it on Matt's chest, basically washing him.  
  
"Jensen… that's gay… even for us."  
  
"Oh shut up and tell me you're not enjoying it."  
  
Jensen smirked and turned Matt over so he could massage his back. Matt didn't argue a lot after that and once Jensen had done showering him, he did the same for Jensen. Except that Jensen blushed a lot but that was expected. He was the one taking care of people, the other way around seemed very strange. But he didn't say anything, not even when Matt insisted to dry him, running the towel against his skin with special care.  
  
"Dude…" Matt finally say, putting the towel down. "You really have freckles everywhere… Remind me to count them if I have the time."  
  
"Yeah sure… We'll do that the day you're very bored."  
  
"Or very horny?"  
  
"Matt shut up…"  
  
"What? Freckles are sexy."  
  
Jensen laughed at that and made his way back to his room, trying to find them some clean clothes. He stepped into some cotton pants and one of his Led Zeppelin shirts. "I don't know if I have anything in your size, Matt." Jensen said head still inside his closet.  
  
"What?" Matt pushed him a little and looked at himself. "And what is that?" Matt had put on one of Jensen's old jeans, without any underwear and smiled. "See? Now I'm wearing your clothes. Officially yours."  
  
"Cause you weren't before?"  
  
"Details!" Matt silenced him with a light kiss on his cheek and for Jensen it was just too much. He had to be dreaming, Matt was wearing his clothes, looking hot and cute at the same time in those tight jeans he used to wear years ago and… Just… Everything seemed unreal. Jensen's bubble broke when Matt got out of his bedroom. "Matt… Where are you going?"  
  
The younger man stopped in the doorway and turned to Jensen, smiling. "Hmmm… Breakfast? You can't just expect me to be able to function without food just after the night you fucked me senseless, right? Damn and I thought you were smart."  
  
"But…" But you got no shirt on and Misha and Jared are probably here. Jensen never got to say this words because Matt was already gone. He just rolled his eyes and followed him. So much for the romantic breakfast in bed he had planned in his mind.  
  
And, as Jensen made his way to the kitchen downstairs, he knew his private moment with Matt was over. Why? Oh maybe because he could hear Jared's laugh and yeah, that meant he and Misha were back. Jensen loved his roommates, but now that he wasn't working during the morning anymore, he would have loved, LOVED, to eat his breakfast with Matt only, cuddle some more and maybe… You know… Yeah, he was a perv, screw him. (Like anyone would not have those kinds of thoughts around Matt… A shirtless Matt by the way).  
  
Jensen entered the kitchen to find Jared eating his pancakes while Matt and Misha were talking, both leaned against the counter. Expect that Matt was half naked, and no, Jensen was so not done obsessing about that. But Matt didn't seem to mind, the blushing was on Jensen's face and Matt was just like a fish into the water, making casual conversation, smiling and laughing. And when he finally noticed Jensen, he offered him a big bright smile.  
  
"Oh there you are… Thought I lost you in the way."  
  
Before Jensen could protest, Matt was wrapping his arms around him and kissing him. Jensen tried to pull away, but these were Matt's lips and he didn't really care about Misha and Jared laughing in the background. He managed to pull away blushing, while they were commenting.  
  
"Well, well, seems like you two had a very good night." Jared said, still chewing.  
  
"Jay don't be like that, they probably won't tell us anything, right Matt?"  
  
Matt spun around to Misha and rolled his eyes. "Screw you Misha, even I'm not falling for that one."  
  
"I'm your employer and I demand to…"  
  
"Misha kiss my ass, I'm so not on duty right now and besides my ass belong to the man behind me."  
  
"So… At least we know who's the bottom now! And you owe me twenty bucks Misha!" Jared clapped his hands.  
  
"Fuck… Should have known Jenny would fuck him." Misha growled as he gave his money to Jared.  
  
"What can I say? Can't resist the Ackles." Matt sat down at the table next to Jared. "Hey are there any pancakes left?"  
  
Jensen was just watching them. He just couldn't believe what was happening to him. His boyfriend and his best friends, getting along very well. He smiled as Matt was snatching more food from Jared's plate, Jared almost growling at him and Misha asking to those two children to behave. Jensen rolled his eyes and turned off the coffee machine. Yeah… He was just very lucky.  
  
\----  
  
  



	5. Chapter 5

And all of a sudden Jensen found himself waking up to find Matt’s toothbrush next to his, having spare laundry at Matt’s place and often catching Richard wearing his shirts…. Yeah talk about awkward. Jared and Misha were ecstatic with his new situation, off course.  
  
“Since you started having sex again, it's like you’re reborn.” said Misha one morning while pinching Jensen’s cheek, and Jared shook his head “Shut up Mish..it's love, you don’t make jokes about love” and he winked at Jensen while walking out of the kitchen. Jensen shrugged and kept drinking his coffee as his friends walked out of the house, going to work, going to whatever Misha did all day long. He smiled as he finished his coffee. “Yeah.. Maybe it is love” he left the mug in the sink before going upstairs to brush his teeth.  
  
The day passed by quickly, well almost all of it, apart from some minor problems with some kid’s vomiting and all the other kids starting screaming, or the lack of nurses, it wasn’t so bad. Certainly after Matt’s text it went much faster – Guess who will have a free house tonight? I’ll wait. M – he suddenly noticed it was time to go home, to Matt’s house but who really cared right?  
  
“Take care kid.” Jensen said to his last patient as he patted his shoulder, then in no time he was out of the room and into the changing room for a quick shower and then he rushed to his car. He really missed Matt, two days was a long time… Too long.  
  
Jensen knocked on the door two times, it was like their secret code, well that’s how Matt called it. He was amused by how much of a kid Matt could be, so he just rolled on with it, in the end he didn’t like to admit it but he had fun too. “Hello Handsome, looking for some fun?” Matt said as he leaned against the half opened door, exposing his naked torso and winking. Obviously he knew Jensen had a thing for him shirtless and in gym pants, so he tried to wear them as often as he could, not that he used to wear much else anyway.  
  
“Yes… I’ve been told here is the right place.” Jensen gulped, exaggerating what he really felt, Matt would think it was a joke but it was really hard to control his salivation in front of that vision.  
  
“Well then.” Matt let him in “You are in the right place babe” he stole a kiss, and then another one and another again, until Jensen was breathless and flushed.  
  
“So plan for tonight, movie and…”  
  
“Food” said Matt, “I’ve cooked for you..well Dick did, we did it together.”  
  
Jensen smiled “I’m not sure if I want to eat that… Are you sure you don’t want to order some take away?”  
  
“No, you…ugh I hate you. I cooked for you and you will eat it.” Jensen took his shoes and jacket off as Matt talked. “Oh… Jen, you better like it or if you don’t fake it really well.”  
  
Jensen pouted “Why though… You are so mean.”  
  
“No, I’m wise, and if you don't like my food, you don’t get this sweet ass” They both started laughing and Matt heated the food. As Jensen walked back to the kitchen, and no he wasn’t giggling as he held The Notebook and other two movies in his hands, he waved the DVDs in the air since he didn’t knew what Matt would've liked to watch.  
  
"Okay, so choose a random number from one to three, quick.”  
  
Matt looked at him and shook his head “I don’t want to watch Men in Black again Jen…“  
  
"Fine because The Notebook is so much better… ”  
  
"It's Dick’s…”  
  
“Don’t lie to me Mattie.” Jensen said as he reached over and kissed Matt’s cheek “ I know where his movies are.. And believe me I don’t recall cheesy non porn movies in his collection.”  
  
Matt chuckled “Well... You caught me.”  
  
“Then we have a movie”  
  
“Dude…“  
  
“No Matt… This will be nice and nobody will ever know.”  
  
And that’s how they ended up with a full stomach. After all Richard wasn’t a bad cook, because Jensen was almost sure he did the cooking and Matt just, well, did the Matt and looked good in an apron. Anyway that’s how they ended up cuddling on the floor, backs pressed against the couch, huge duvet over them while watching The Notebook.  
  
“So explain me again, why do you own this movie?” Jensen whispered against Matt’s head, that was resting on his chest.  
  
“Well… I just think it's adorable and…” he looked up at Jensen “Yes, you can say it's very gay in the bad way.”  
  
Jensen smiled “I wasn’t going to say that, I think you are adorable for owning this movie, like fourteen year old girl adorable. It makes me want to pinch your cheek and… ”  
  
He stopped talking and tickled Matt, who screamed and wiggled “Please not tickles…Jen, p… please!”  
  
Jensen obviously ignored his begs and kept going. “What do I need to do to make you stop, anything…”  
  
And suddenly the tickles stopped .“Anything you said? Well you can start with a kiss."  
  
“Oh really?” asked Matt while catching his breath and turning around to face Jensen wiggling his fingers in the air.  
  
“I would make it quick baby, they are going crazy, tickling you is the second best…"  
  
Matt shut him up suddenly when he sucked on his lower lip, biting gently on it before letting it go and placing little teasing kisses on Jensen’s mouth. Matt's mouth was practically shut and he managed to make a few sounds, driving Jensen insane. “Matt…” Jensen run a finger close to his armpit. “I can start again anytime.” Matt smiled against his lips and licked his way into Jensen’s mouth, humming as Jensen kissed him back, slow and lazy. No rush into the kiss, because they were alone. The movie kept playing in the background but neither of them really cared about that anymore.  
  
And so, slowly, almost like it was to good to be true, they kept kissing and Matt ended up straddling his hips. Jensen didn't mind at all, his hands found their place on Matt's ass and the latter growled into his mouth and moved too, rolling down his hips against Jensen. It was Jensen's turn to growl now and his hands squeezed Matt's ass, making them both groan. They kept kissing, tongues gloriously meeting, none of them wanting to part. There was just no way, Jensen had spent the entire day dreaming of those lips, he couldn't let go… Not right now.  
  
Just like this, exchanging the most sweetest kisses, four hands moved along Matt's body, Matt's hands on Jensen's as he was exploring Matt's body. Jensen lost no time to take one of Matt's nipple into his mouth, his lips wrapped around the tender flesh, hands already tracing the outlines of Matt's firmed muscles. Matt arched under his touch, his hands in Jensen's short hair. He pulled him for another kiss and the next thing to drop were his pants and underwear. They struggled a little bit on the floor but they succeeded eventually, smile on their faces.  
  
Matt couldn't stop moving and Jensen wished he had more hands to explore the naked body above him. He licked Matt's Adam's apple, then traced his collarbone with his tongue, his shoulder blades with his nails and then his fingers were on Matt's ass, caressing the skin down there.  
  
"Oh come on…" Matt moaned, pushing his ass against Jensen's fingers.  
  
Jensen chuckled, he had his head against Matt's neck and Matt's arms were wrapped around his head, fingers still in his hair."Sorry what was that?" Jensen repeated the motion, his fingers almost going where Matt needed the most. But almost, Jensen stopped right when his thumb was between Matt's cheeks, big and tempting.  
  
"Jensen don't… Gosh…" Matt shivered again, moving a little bit more, basically rubbing himself against Jensen's finger. He let escape a low moan when it finally hit his hole and kissed Jensen. He stopped when Jensen tried to kiss him back by grabbing his face with his two hands, moaning "God I'm gonna make you feel so good."  
  
Next thing he knew, Matt was opening a condom who was apparently hidden under the couch. What? Jensen would think about this later, much, much later, especially now that Matt was opening his zipper and grabbing his cock. Oh… Jensen moaned, pushing his head against the couch when Matt put the condom in place and stroked him a few minutes.  
  
Jensen smiled as he moved forward looking for Matt’s lips not wanting to loose the kiss, even if he was practically breathless.  
  
“I want you, to sit here and stay still.”  
  
Jensen shivered to those words. “Not even…”  
  
“Nothing Jensen… Just let me” and he believed Matt was tired of words as he started kissing him again more roughly this time. Jensen’s eyes were now opened and he could only imagine how it would feel to replace Matt’s fingers with his. Matt was looking at him while fucking himself open with his own fingers, getting himself ready for him, Jensen could feel the sweat drops falling down his back, his hands were twitching with the need to move, to touch.  
  
But he couldn’t, he had to obey to his orders, that was why he did the only thing he could which was kissing him, trying to give him every thing his hands couldn’t. Jensen sucked on his tongue as he swallowed each of his little moans. He could feel Matt shaking slightly as he rested a hand on his chest and parted from the kiss.  
  
He couldn’t resist it anymore “Matt…God… I need you, please.” he begged as he licked Matt’s Adam’s apple, which granted him a low grumble and a simple yes.  
  
Matt gave a few more strokes at Jensen’s cock before guiding him between his cheeks and Jensen tried to move his hips “Mhm… Jen you need to be a good boy and stay still for me, you won’t regret it” and with that Jensen dropped his head back, just feeling what Matt wanted him to. He could feel Matt slowly letting him in, his breath becoming quicker as he rested his head on his shoulder, mouth half opened, letting a small moan of pleasure out.  
  
Jensen could see little drops of sweat appearing along his forehead and neck, the light from the TV making them glisten in a way that made Jensen reach out to lick each one of them. But he couldn’t even if he wanted it badly, as much as he wanted to snap his hips up and give it all to him. However he wasn't done appreciating Matt’s face, that was a perfect mix between pleasure and pain. And apparently Matt wanted the same as Jensen because he suddenly dropped all the way down and with a loud moan. Jensen felt him flexing around him, his body accepting him.  
  
That felt good and it was pure torture because Jensen could do nothing but watch. And feel. And oh god yes he could feel. His cock was trapped deep inside Matt's ass and Matt… Matt was just glorious, his own hard cock laying between them, very tempting. He took a few seconds to let his body adjust to the sensation of fullness before he got up a little, he wrapped his arms around Jensen's neck.  
  
Jensen whimpered at the sensation and, damn, he wanted to touch. He kissed Matt, oh fuck, he wanted to put his own hands on Matt's hips and help him go up and down, help him take his cock. But Matt did it himself, he threw a last wink at Jensen before he moved, up and down, whole body tense around Jensen, his cock brushing against Jensen's shirt. Fuck. It felt amazing.  
  
Matt tilted his head back moaning Jensen's name and he repeated the motion. Again and again. He wasn't stopping and his rhythm was quite quick as he stretched himself opened with Jensen's length, hot, deep in his insides, driving both of them crazy. Jensen grabbed the couch even harder than before, he needed to touch Matt so badly. He was swallowing each of his desperate "Jensen…" with his tongue, he pressed both of his hands on Matt's ass, helping him go just a little deeper and…  
  
"Jesus fuck." Jensen growled as Matt started moving his hips in a different way, tracing circles and just… just riding him. Matt was so lost in sheer pleasure, in getting his own release that he didn't seem to notice Jensen anymore. God, Jensen wanted to give him so much more, he could give him that release, Jensen could give him more. Matt suddenly opened his eyes and his head fell back again against Jensen's shoulder, his nails digging into the skin of Jensen's neck.  
  
"Fuck… Feels good right? And guess what big boy?" Matt pushed himself up and down very quickly, making them moan again. "You don't get to touch at all… I'm gonna come from your cock alone."  
  
That sentence alone and Matt's smirk could have make Jensen come in an instant. But he didn't. Oh no he didn't. Instead he growled and grabbed Matt's hips. "Oh yeah… Think I can do that." The moves were quick and in an instant, Matt was pinned against the floor, Jensen's body all over him.  
  
"That's cheating you shouldn't… Oh…" Jensen had moved his hips, going way deeper than Matt could have with his previous moves. Jensen didn't want to talk anymore or hold back, no… He just wanted Matt. He kissed him hungrily as his hips moved against Matt's, pounding and pounding inside of him, his cock breaking everything inside of Matt. He felt Matt moving against the floor, his back was probably going to hurt because Jensen's hips were hard and strong, making Matt slide against the floor, but he didn't say anything. Matt tried to touch himself but Jensen grabbed both of his hands and pinned them above his head. No. Matt was coming from this. Only from this.  
  
When Matt's head fell back to his side, Jensen didn't give him time to catch his breath and his tongue was there, passionate, demanding. Matt shivered, not struggling at all but totally giving in. And, as pure waves of pleasure ran through his spine, Matt's body tightened around Jensen's cock, swallowing the other man whole. Jensen cursed under his breath and moved, drowning into Matt. Clothes brushing against naked and wet skin, cold buckle against hot muscles. The movements weren't so controlled anymore and Jensen just thrusted hard inside of Matt. He left Matt's mouth to lick his ear.  
  
"Come on… Come on Matt… Let go… Come for me." And if Matt had anything to say at all, it ended up in the giant cry as he obeyed. He came, mouth hung open, trying to scream some more but he couldn't. "Fuck… Fuck…" Jensen didn't expect him to be so perfect and he came too.  
  
And Jensen's last move was to get out of Matt and fall back on the floor next to him. They were both breathing hard and honestly, Jensen felt amazing. He glanced to Matt and he was watching him too, chest moving as he was still panting.  
  
"You fucker… cheater. Told you not to move."  
  
"Shut up… You loved it."  
  
"Hmmm… " Matt closed his eyes. "Maybe."  
  
"Hey… What are you doing?"  
  
"Sleeping."  
  
"Here?"  
  
"You think I can move after that? Jensen please… Use your brain…" Matt laughed a little and cuddled up against him. Jensen looked down at him… Well… He stood up a little and managed to grab the remote to turn off the TV. He then threw the condom away and caught the duvet still on the floor and threw it over Matt.  
  
"Better?"  
  
"Hmm…" Matt opened his eyes and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. "There… much better."  
  
♦♦♦  
  
Sleeping with Matt cuddled up next to him was the best thing in the world and really, Jensen could have stayed on the floor all day. He didn't mind, he was used to Matt snoring in his ear anyway and Matt looked rather comfortable on him. Jensen wrapped one arm around him and a smile appeared on Matt's face.  
  
"Hmm… Something tells me you're not asleep." Jensen whispered against his lips.  
  
"Not true. I am."  
  
Matt didn't open his eyes, no, he pressed himself even more against Jensen. Jensen laughed slightly, everything about Matt was just absolutely adorable. And when he finally opened his eyes, Jensen had a bright smile on his face. Matt looked absolutely gorgeous. Jensen had often heard people saying how his own eyes would change color but he had always thought it was bullshit, until now. Matt's eyes, green like his, changed color from time to time and Jensen was glad he had noticed.  
  
"Okay so maybe I am awake… But the plan was to stay asleep and distract you with my awesome beauty so you can stay here all day." By the time he finished his sentence, Matt had a small pout on his face.  
  
Jensen laughed harder this time and played with Matt's lower lip with his fingers. "Hmmm… It might have worked if I didn't have work this afternoon."  
  
"You know what they say about that?"  
  
"No, but please feel free to enlighten me Matt."  
  
"Well…"  
  
Matt didn't finish his sentence because in that exact same moment, someone opened the front door. Matt froze next to Jensen. "Shit… Must be…"  
  
"Oh my God… What on earth are you guys you doing in there… And … Mattie are you naked? I thought we'd agreed, the living room is a common zone, no sex in there."  
  
Jensen and Matt both giggled as Richard was looking down at them from above the couch, hands on his hips. He didn't look shocked at all, in fact, he had a smile on his face.  
  
"Hi Richard." simply said Jensen, his grip on Matt going tighter.  
  
"Don't you hi me young man, you and I need to have a serious talk about this daughter of mine!"  
"God damn it Richard, for the last time, I am a guy."  
  
"Yep… I can confirm that Richard, Matt is definitely a guy." Jensen nodded and Matt kissed him on a cheek.  
  
"A guy with a dick. " added Matt.  
  
"Yes, a guy with a dick." repeated Jensen.  
  
"And balls."  
  
"And b…"  
  
Matt interrupted Jensen again with a kiss, but this time, it was a real one, on the lips. Jensen didn't really care about Richard all so suddenly, it was their first real kiss of the morning, which meant it had to be perfect. So he grabbed Matt's face with his free hand and brushed his tongue against Matt's. Not too fast but not too slow, just enjoying Matt's taste.  
  
"Gosh… You guys are disgusting. Oh and Mattie, you're totally paying for my mental trauma… Are you guys even listening to me?"  
  
The answer was no, they were too busy kissing. Richard just sighed and left the living room, apparently heading for his bedroom.  
  
Matt parted from Jensen's lips with a smile on his face. "So…" he said as if Richard had never been there. "I was thinking you, me, the kitchen now. I can make you some pancakes, pancakes are actually one of the only things I can cook."  
  
Jensen bit his lower lips and glanced at the TV, showing him the time. Hmmm… It was already 10 am and his shift at the hospital was going to start in five hours, he still had to go home, shower, call Misha to remind him it was his turn to go to the grocery store, remind Jared to go to the hairdresser, call his mum… Oh and go to work and not be late or Danneel would kick him.  
Matt saw his hesitation because he kissed him again.  
  
"Did I mention that I'm going to cook naked?"  
  
With that, he stood up and went for the kitchen in his naked glory, too well aware of the fact that Jensen's eyes were on his ass.  
  
Jensen moaned and followed him. He was going to regret this much later.  
  
♦♦♦  
  
"Ackles, is it normal that you smell blueberries?"  
  
"What? Don't tell me the smell is still here!"  
  
Danneel laughed as Jensen was checking himself. Ha ha ha… Very funny. Jensen rolled his eyes as they were walking in the hospital hallways. Today he was making his shift with Danneel and, lucky for him, he had been right on time. Well… She wouldn't be laughing with him if he hadn't.  
  
Anyway, blueberries, how the fuck Jensen was supposed to explain that? Matt made him blueberries pancakes and things got slightly out of control? Good thing Richard didn't enter the kitchen the moment Matt had pressed Jensen against the kitchen counter to suck his cock, blueberries juice still on his lips. Gosh… Jensen grinned like a fool at the thought of that.  
  
"Okay, now you're doing the stupid I'm-in-love smile!"  
  
"What?" He turned to her. "No I'm not."  
  
"Oh so you're not in love?"  
  
"No… I meant I wasn't smiling."  
  
"So you're in love?"  
  
"No… I mean… Can we please have a work day without talking about my personal life?"  
  
"Oh okay Mr Grumpy." Danneel laughed even more. She put her red hair behind her ear and sighed. "What do you want to talk about? At least one of us is in a happy and healthy relationship so…"  
  
"What do you mean… I thought you were dating that guy in the IR, Ryan or whatever"  
  
"Well… I wouldn't call fucking once in a while dating. But that's just me, the unlucky girl… "  
  
Danneel had a sad expression on her face for a moment and Jensen grabbed her shoulder, squeezing it. "Oh I don't need a pep talk Ackles, I'm still your boss, now spill the details of your wonderful life before I decide to change the hours of your shift again."  
  
"Oh okay …" Jensen laughed a little, he much preferred this Danneel. "Well what the hell do you want me to say… The sex is good, Matt is awesome guy so… Yeah, it's amazing."  
  
"So no L-word yet?"  
  
"Oh come on… It's been barely two months, let's not jump to stupid conclusions."  
  
"There's nothing stupid about being in love Jensen, you know that right?"  
  
Jensen paused in the middle of the hallway. Was he in love with Matt? That might sound dull and stupid, but Jensen had no freaking clue. In his life, everything had a place, a purpose, a meaning. But with Matt? It was the opposite, he never knew what to expect and… It was good. Simply and plainly good. "Yeah I guess… But how do you even know?"  
  
Danneel smiled. "Trust me Ackles… You'll know it. Now come on, we've got more children to save!"  
  
"I love it when you say that, you make me feel like a superhero."  
  
"Oh good idea… Next staff party we come dressed up, I'll be Wonder Woman and you'll be Batman, deal?"  
  
"Deal."  
  
♦♦♦  
  
Jensen felt horrible about having to call off their Thursday night date, he waited all week to have some quality time with Matt, and then boom! There had been a minor fire in a factory near a school, so they were kinda overbooked with really worried parents and crying children. Maybe it was the fumes or just the stress of the whole situation, he explained them, more than once. For as much as he wanted to be with Matt his work came fist, he couldn’t leave Danneel alone for this one.  
  
“Don’t worry Dan, he will understand… And you need me here” he said before taking a two minute break to call Matt. He sounded upset and that made Jensen feel like a shitty boyfriend. Not that he was having fun, taking three shifts in a row wasn’t fun.  
  
He spent his night there, at the hospital working with Danneel and by the time he went home it was already time to go back. As he changed his clothes he called that fancy Italian take away Matt liked so much. Jensen drove home, showered and grabbed a bottle of wine from Misha’s improvised tavern under the stairs before he run downstairs, not wanting to waste time waiting for the elevator. And then he was in his car, driving towards Matt’s house, smile bright and wide. He missed Matt more than he missed sleeping… And that coming from Jensen was a clear declaration of that word he was not ready to pronounce yet.  
  
He walked so fast, he was almost running and rung the bell. He smiled as he heard the keys moving from the other side of the door. “Guess who has some delicious wine and fettuccine Alfredo to repay you for last night?” he said as soon as the door opened.  
  
“Oh… Hum thanks dude, I guess you really missed me.” Richard smiled and scratched his head, he was wearing some pajama pants and a tank top two sizes too big, thing that made Jensen realize it was probably Matt’s.  
  
“Hey, can I come in?"  
  
“Sure sure, make yourself at home” Richard looked confused but Jensen was too busy thinking about Matt’s reaction to ask about it.  
  
“Where is Matt? Call him for me please, it's kind of a surprise” Richard laughed “No problem,” he walked to the phone.  
  
“Still you could call him yourself, cheap-o.”    
  
"Are you really going to call him with the phone, isn’t it easier to scream or somethi… “    
  
Richard interrupted him, sighing “Oh shit!” he left the phone down before talking again “You didn’t know… Fuck!”  
  
“K… Know what?” all of a sudden Jensen was nervous and his hands were itchy. “He started working again… Today is his first day back, at the…" Jensen left the food and the wine on the coffee table and finished Richard’s sentence  
  
“Strip joint.”  
  
“He must have forgotten… Fuck! I’m sorry you bought all of this for nothing… We can have a bro night, or something I don’t mind some company.”  
  
Jensen was already up and walking towards the door as Richard finished his sentence “No, don’t worry.” He closed the door behind himself and walked back to the car.  
  
It wasn’t a big deal, he kept repeating that to himself as he drove towards the club, it's nothing Jensen, he just forgot, not a big deal. Not a big deal. He will just dance, nothing bad in that… Not a big deal. Lies, he couldn’t even convince himself.  
  
Jensen parked his car in front of the entrance, not that he cared if Misha got mad for that, he always left the shoes in front of the door and no one could say a beep about it. He walked inside noticing how Misha spotted him and turned away, that man knew him better than he should have.  
  
He sat down on a first row seat, just under the main stage and waited. He didn’t know if he was mad or… Jensen just didn’t know what he felt, he was just tired and mainly disappointed. But it was nothing really, Matt had probably forgotten, and like Matt said himself one day when Jensen asked him why he started to strip anyway, it was just a job. Nothing else. Yeah your boyfriend is gonna get naked and rub himself against random strangers and get paid for that no biggie...  
  
Jensen growled and ignored the voice at the back of his head. Besides, the show was starting. The curtains opened to Genevieve and Vicky dressed as police women, with leather jackets and boots and matching hats, they started lip singing to the music, dancing in the way that could have made Jensen's mama blush.  
  
"Do you want to touch?" was asking Genevieve. "Yeah!" was answering Vicky. They danced pretty close now, pressed against each other, moving like one single person and Jensen's head was slightly moving in rhythm as the other men of the audience were screaming and applauding, almost covering the music. Jensen almost closed his eyes when they started undressing each other, but lucky for him, they ended up both in black and very short underwear, caressing each other, right in front of Jensen.  
  
He turned his head, because after all, he had been raised well and at this exact moment, Matt came up on the stage. Jensen swallowed hard, because if Matt as a fireman was hot, Matt as a police man was absolutely gorgeous. His hat was awry on his head and he walked in rhythm with the music, his hips swaying, a smirk on his face. Matt was playing with his truncheon and he pretended to hit Vicky and Genevieve with it, the girls responding with hurt expressions that could have easily been seen as moans.  
  
Jensen was holding his beer tight now, but he had a smile on his face. Nothing to worry about, just dancing. He did jump a little bit in his seat when the two girls started undressing Matt, clearly asking to the crowd if they wanted to touch Matt. No. No touching, Jensen thought, Matt was his. But it was nothing, Matt was half naked all the time. So yeah nothing. They kept dancing for a while, the three of them rubbing against each other. And then Matt's pants were taken off by four hands and he still had that devious smile on his face.  
  
Jensen had never seen him like this and he was kind of jealous. Matt seemed in his element, in the spotlight, he was glowing and, ridiculous thought really, it was like he was making love to the entire crowd. And Jensen didn't like that. Matt was in very short underwear too now and Jensen didn't like that, at all. The guys behind him were still screaming and Jensen didn't even notice Gen and Vicky leaving the stage. No, his eyes were on Matt. And right now, Matt was on his fours, crawling to the front of the stage and… Jensen dropped his beer when he jumped out off the stage and ended up on one of the front tables.  
  
And Matt didn't stop there. Oh no… He was still lip singing and he straddled one of the guy's hips and started rubbing against him, the guy clearly enjoying it. And that was when Jensen lost it. He stood up so quickly that he made the table fall, all the heads turning to him. Including Matt.  
  
There. He had finally saw him. And quicker than he ever had done in his whole life, Jensen left.  
  
By the time Jensen reached his car, his hands were shaking. He tried to open the door, but he dropped the keys to the floor. "God fucking damn it!" He hit his car hard and then he heard his name.  
  
"Jensen! Hey! Wait!"  
  
Jensen spun around to see Matt. Matt had clothes on now, he was wearing his police man pants in fact, and a hoodie open on his naked chest. A few minutes ago this sight could have make Jensen smile, but right now, he wasn't smiling. Matt was, and with that same smile, he approached Jensen.  
  
"How did you know I was there? Rich told you? So how was your day?"  
  
Jensen frowned. Matt wanted to make small talk now? After Jensen saw him… And that guy and… Jensen laughed, low and bitter, before he answered. "Oh my day was freaking awesome Matt… Especially the part where my boyfriend was dancing semi naked in front of bunch of pervy and drunk guys!"  
  
The smile on Matt's face didn't fade away, in fact, he even rolled his eyes. "Oh come on Jen.. It was nothing. Just let me finish another dance and I'm all yours, we can't go back to my place and…"  
  
"No."  
  
Jensen didn't shout the word but his tone had been cold enough to stop Matt. And he must have seen something was wrong, he tried to touch Jensen, but Jensen pulled away, heart beating fast.  
  
"What do you mean no?"  
  
"No Matt, I don't want to go home with you and watch a movie, cuddle on the couch and pretend none of this happened!"  
  
"None of what? Jensen! Nothing happened, okay? I was just dancing! This is just a job!"  
  
"This is not just a job and you know it Matt! If that is so simple, why did you stop when we started dating, hmm? Why? Are you bored of me already and you want to meet new guys and then bring them home to let them fuck you like you did with me? Like a fucking wh…"  
  
Jensen couldn't stop the words coming out of his mouth, he was shouting now and he really didn't expect the punch Matt gave him. Right in his nose. The strength of it had him against his car, and when Jensen touched his nose, he realized that he was bleeding. He wiped away the blood and looked at Matt. Matt had his fists clenched and he was breathing hard, his chest moving.  
  
"Like a fucking whore? Is that what were you going to say? Do not make me sound like something I'm not Jensen. I might be a lot of things, but I'm not a whore. The only reason I stopped dancing after your birthday is because I thought you were special and I was asking Misha non stop about you… Do you think I care about any of those guys inside? That I…"  
  
Matt didn't finish his sentence, he just sighed and turned around and left. And Jensen probably had a broken nose, he should have gone home but he didn't. He stayed right where he was, staring at the spot where Matt was a few minutes ago.  
  
And Jensen didn’t realize that his tears were getting mixed with the blood dropping from his nose, he took a deep breath and wiped the blood off with the back of his hand. He wasn’t going to cry for that. He wasn’t going to cry for Matt. The man he lo… The man that hurt him so bad and didn’t even notice it. He got in the car and slammed the door. The stereo automatically turned on, the mix tape Matt gave him playing, those silly pop songs he liked so much.  
  
Jensen groaned as he threw it on the back seat, he held the tears back so hard his vision got blurry. He parked the car and closed his eyes, his head was hurting and the nose bleed hadn’t stopped yet. He always liked Matt’s strong hands… Now not so much.  
  
He walked upstairs, slowly, fearing he would find someone at home, he just wanted to be alone. He opened the door and the first thing that welcomed him was the laughter of Jared, he was watching a movie and the lights were out. Jensen tried to be as quiet as he could, not wanting to be noticed but then “Uh… Hello stranger, hiding from someone?” came from the sofa.  
  
Jensen rolled his eyes and answered as he clenched his fists “No, I’m not” and just with those three words Jared was up walking towards him.  
  
“What’s the matter Jenny?” He turned on the light. “What the hell happened to you Jensen?” in two seconds Jared was all over Jensen, big hands pushing his head back. “Dear God… This looks awful… Come here." Jensen followed Jared into the kitchen. He didn’t notice he started sobbing as soon as he sat down. Jared looked at him in a way it reminded him of how his mother would look at him when he came back from the paint-ball matches, like he was so hurt he couldn’t even notice it. Except that this time, Jensen could.  
  
“So I’m waiting Jen, spit it out. What happened? Who did this to you?”  
  
“N… nothing, Matt.”  
  
“Oh..wait what? Why?” Jared said as he cleaned Jensen with some cold water and a kitchen towel.  
  
“I went to see him at work and I flipped out…" his voice broke and he looked down, he really didn’t want to talk right now.  
  
“Working as in the strip club?” Jensen just nodded “Not a good idea moving your head like that.” Jared said as he smiled sadly “And I can get why… You love him it's only normal.”  
  
“No… I don’t.” he almost barked out eyes shut, not wanting to see Jared’s face.  
  
“Yes you do, dumb ass… You do!”    
  
“No, Jay… Not anymore.” And with that Jensen lost it, hugging Jared and sobbing even harder. The dirty towel now on the floor, his nose was still bleeding lightly against Jared’s white tee but neither of them could have cared less. Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen and didn’t say anything, he just held him close, tightly. There was no need for words, when his best friend was that hurt and the only think he could do was lend him his shoulder to cry on.  
  
Jensen didn’t notice when Jared led him upstairs and got him out of his clothes, he just knew that all of a sudden he was in his pajama, lying under the covers of his bed while he hugged the helmet. He sighed and started crying again, then he felt a strong hold on him, Jared was still there “Shh… Jen it's going to be okay. Just sleep it off.” he murmured and Jensen could only whisper back a thank you, before he closed his eyes and tried to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

  
Jensen was like a zombie.  
  
He woke up, drank coffee, went to the hospital, did his shift, went back home and stayed in his room alone. Some days he was sleeping, other days he was reading a book, and sometimes he was just staring at the ceiling. The helmet was still close to him. Jared was making sure he ate and went to his job, he gave Jensen small pats on the shoulder every now and then and would always offer him a smile in the morning. Misha on the other hand…  
  
Jensen had heard Jared and Misha fighting the night when everything went wrong. He didn't quite understand what they were saying but he was certain that Misha had tried to go into his room but Jay stopped him. It was like that between him and Misha now, Misha always looked at Jensen as if he was about to say something but he always gave up with a sigh and left. And there were a lot of things Jensen wanted to say to Misha, to ask to him. Oh and to another person too…  
  
But that was out of the question. Jensen didn't want to be hurt anymore, he had cried one night and it was enough. He was cutting out the pain of his life, which meant Matt. Two weeks passed like this and Jensen managed to get through them. He wasn't fine, but he was okay.  
  
"Okay Ackles, enough." Danneel said one day.  
  
Jensen turned to her, a frown on his face. "What… Did I do something wrong? Did I mess a paperwork again?" he added seeing Danneel's hands full of folders.  
  
"No. Just…" Danneel put everything down and went close to him. "Forget the work for two seconds. What is wrong with you?"  
  
Jensen sighed and went back to his computer. "Nothing okay."  
  
"Yeah sure… Come on Ackles, you're not escaping this conversation."  
  
With that, Danneel spun around his chair, which meant that Jensen had to look at her. He sighed and crossed his arms on his chest. "Danneel… I don't want to talk about it."  
  
"Oh… so there is something wrong… Let me guess, it has something to do with Ma…"  
  
"I don't want to talk about it." Jensen said a little bit more aggressively.  
  
"Ouch. Did you two broke up or… Oh my god! You did! Oh Jensen I'm so sorry, what happened?"  
  
"Nothing. I screwed up, this is over, can I get back to work now?"  
  
Jensen didn't wait for her answer and turned his chair around.  
  
"Wow Ackles… You screwed up and it's over? God damn it, you fucking moron. You were happy, you were in love and… you were happy! We all have our insecurities and our doubts, but you just don't give up something good just because suddenly things are hard."  
  
"Danneel please don't…"  
  
"Don't what Jensen? You want me to cuddle you and tell you that everything is gonna be okay? Sorry kiddo, no can't do. Gosh… I never thought you were a quitter. "  
  
That broke something into Jensen and he stood up, facing her. "I am not a quitter."  
  
"Oh really?" Danneel smiled and crossed her arms on her chest. "Well if you're not… Would you mind to cross the street and get us some coffee? I don't know you might even see Matt and apologize and make things right, don't you think?"  
  
As he opened his mouth to reply with a harsh “Sure, no problem” he immediately regretted it. Damn big mouth and Danneel for knowing how to push his buttons. He took a random paper he found on his pocket and read it like it was a novel while on the elevator, trying to distract himself. Jensen. You are stupid. He thought to himself. So stupid. Then he went outside of the building, trying to avoid the crowd, he quickly crossed the road and got inside the shop. Took a deep breath and got in line.  
  
Person after person Jensen got every time more nervous, he felt the sweat rolling down his back, suddenly aware of everything that surrounded him. He looked up, scared and exited at the same time, wanting to see Matt, he missed his face, but so mad and petrified by the prospect.  
  
“Hello, my name is Cindy, would you like to try your new white chocolate moka?” He smiled at the blonde girl behind the counter.  
  
“N…no thanks, two espressos.” Even if he tried to not show the fact that he was looking for someone, the girl must have noticed because she asked. “Are you looking for someone?”  
  
Jensen wondered if he should just go for it and ask. After all he made it until there… “Yeah… Matt, he used to… “  
  
The girl turned around to grab his two cups. “Oh yeah Matt… He is not working here anymore, must be like two weeks… He quit.” She said.  
  
Jensen gave her a ten dollar “Thanks, keep the change… ” He turned away not waiting to see her face, the smile she had on her face or to hear the thank you for the tip and other silly things. Dean had no time for this…his hands were shaking, his breath became shorter. He needed to know. He needed to let that weight out. As he got back on his floor he gave the coffee to Danneel and asked for the permission to leave.  
  
As he drove back home he hoped Misha would still be at home.  
  
  
♦♦♦  
  
  
While he stared at the road, stuck in the traffic Jensen couldn’t stop thinking about Misha. Fuck he needed to talk to him. He grabbed his phone and marked his number,fingers tapping against the wheel as he waited for Misha to answer.  
  
“Hey Misha..It's me, Jensen”  
  
“Yeah I know dumb ass… My phone tells me who is the caller.” Jensen could detect some anger in his voice but Misha was always Misha and he took it diplomatically.  
  
“Well yeah… are you home?”  
  
“Yes, why?”  
  
“Nothing don’t move I’m about to get there.” And then he hung up. Quickly turning at the first exit to escape the traffic and getting to his house as fast as possible.  
  
Jensen ran upstairs and rushed inside the apartment. Just to find Misha in a his two sizes too small yoga outfit, stretching.  
  
“Hey Jen… Sit here, quick or I will be late for class”    
  
“Class?” he asked, Misha finished college a good while ago.  
  
“Yoga classes, I’m almost getting my teacher diploma.” Misha said smiling as he stretched his quadriceps. Well now at least Jensen knew what Misha did all day long, he went to yoga classes…obviously. “So you wanted to talk, speak up.” Misha sat up and tapped the floor next to him, Jensen caught the hint and got down next to him.  
  
“So… I wanted to say sorry. For how I’ve been treating you lately, it wasn’t your fault”  
  
“yeah… I know you are, don’t worry.” Misha just shook his head. Sometimes Jensen thought Misha was too good for him.    
  
Jensen took a deep breath “Have you heard of…”  
  
“No, I haven’t and if I did I wouldn’t tell you.” Misha interrupted him.  
  
“You didn’t even let me finish the…“  
  
“Oh but I don’t need you to finish, you want to know about Matt? You want to know how badly you fucked up?” Misha suddenly was serious. “You want to know why he quitted from the club and from Starbucks, why he doesn’t answer my phone calls?” Now Misha was mad, his voice was hard, his eyes cold.  
  
Jensen just stood there mouth open “W… what?”  
  
“Yes, Jensen, guess what? While you pitied yourself for calling the only guy you ever loved a whore and you cried about how stupid you are, he was actually broken.”  
  
And if Jensen had anything to say, he didn't. He shut his mouth and looked at Misha. Misha was right of course, in all of this, Jensen had only thought about himself. How he would feel in this relationship, how he would have to be perfect for Matt, how bad he wanted Matt and… Jensen sighed, his face buried in his hands. He felt a squeeze on his shoulder, but this time when he raised his head, he didn't see hazel eyes, but blue. Misha was offering a light smile, Jensen did his best to smile back, happy to see that he hadn't destroyed everything with one of his best friends too. "I screwed everything up Misha. And I'm really sorry."  
  
"Jensen… I know you and I know you are sorry… But saying it over and over again is not going to change anything. "  
  
"I know… " Jensen took a deep breath. "So… is he… okay?"  
  
"Yeah… from what I can tell Matt is okay. He stormed into my office right after you two had the fight, saying he was quitting and before I had a chance to say anything, he was gone. I saw him a few days after that, with Richard and he looked… you know… okay."  
  
Jensen swallowed hard at that thought, easily picturing Matt with Richard. Happy and smiling. Nothing like he was during their last encounter. "And… did he…"  
  
"No Jensen, he didn't talk about you. Now please, stop acting like a princess and do the right thing. Go see him."  
  
"Misha I'm not sure…"  
  
"God please stop acting like a little girl!" Misha rolled his eyes. " Jensen… do you remember how you and I became friends?"  
  
"Yeah… sure." Jensen shrugged, wondering what it has to do with anything. "You came to me in chemistry class and asked if I needed a partner, and I said yes."  
  
"Exactly my point and do you remember that you were thinking of asking me yourself but…"  
  
"But I was too scared. " finished Jensen.  
  
"Exactly. I'm sorry to say this, but I don't know what you're afraid of, people saying no to you? Rejecting you? You're an awesome person and being your friend is one of the best things that happened to me okay? Matt is good for you, I was surprised that he managed to pass through all your walls. But he did. It took me years to do that and he did it in weeks… So tell me Jensen… It's gotta mean something right?"  
  
"Yes…" Jensen turned his head, looking at nowhere in particular but thinking. Misha's words were sinking it and he was right. Him, Danneel, they were right. He was afraid, he didn't let people in very easily and he could count with the fingers of one hand his friends. Jensen was a very shy and private person, and no way he could have dated someone like Matt. But he did. "Yes." Jensen repeated, a little more firmer this time. "I want Matt. I want to be with him." He turned back to Misha.  
  
"Well… You have your answer… now go get him and beg for forgiveness."  
  
"Yeah…"  
  
Jensen stood up and was followed by Misha. And, he was about to opened the door and Jensen spun around and crushed Misha into a big hugs.  
  
"Thank you… I know I'm not that easy."  
  
"You're welcome big boy… Now let go of me before we both grow up lady parts."  
  
Jensen pulled away, laughing. "But I thought you were a woman Misha."  
  
"Fuck you, not because I like to dress like one that… What the hell are you still doing here? Out. Now!"  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
♦♦♦  
  
  
Possibly Jensen never drove so fast before in his life, sweaty hands and dry mouth as he parked the car. “Okay…Walk there, knock, tell him you’ve been a stupid bastard, beg for forgiveness if you must, you’ve got this.” He said to himself before drying his hands on his jeans and starting to walk towards the porch. He rung the bell and took a deep breath “Okay this is it.” The door opened. Just as planned, he said to himself, follow the plan. But that was impossible since the person who opened the door was a visibly mad Richard.  
  
“What are you doing here?” Richard asked, harsh, not a hint of his usual kindness in his voice, that made Jensen wonder what Misha’s definition of okay was, because maybe, just maybe, Matt wasn't fine… and Richard hated him with a reason.  
  
His heart was pounding like crazy, his chest on the edge of exploding. “Hmmm..hello Richard… “ He got interrupted.  
  
“Listen, I don’t know why you are back here Jensen… I do not want to talk to you, neither does he.”  
  
“Is Matt here… I just wanted to talk and…“  
  
“No, he is not, he will not be here for you…To break his damn heart again.” Jensen could see how Richard’s hands closed up as fists, his jaw tight, cold eyes staring at him. And, for the first time, that tiny man seemed gigantic. Jensen felt little and scared, he felt guilty.  
  
“I’m sorry”  
  
“Well that won’t help me, nor anyone.” Jensen opened his mouth to answer but Richard stopped him. “No, you’ve got to hear why. You want to hear it..that’s why you came here.” Jensen just looked down and sighed, imagining what words were about to come out of Richard’s mouth. “Because you see, after your stupid little act, he quit, and not only from the club, he quit everything. I had him here at home broken, waiting by his phone, but I guess you were too busy to call, or say sorry back then… Am I right?” Jensen closed his eyes, those words hurting more than the punches Richard’s hands were dying to release. “As you whined to your momma and daddy, he was here alone waiting for me, because they also left him, called him with all the kind words in the dictionary you know…”  
  
Jensen looked at Richard, the man’s eyes were watery… Tears of pain and anger Jensen figured. “You… I thought you were good, but you ended up to be like all the rest of them, telling him he isn’t good enough. He is not worthy of you because of his job. Well you know what, he is not. You don’t deserve him, not with how you acted.”  
  
“I know, I fucked up…I’m here to try to fix my mess.”  
  
“No. Jensen, No. You see when you love someone, you don’t… Fuck…You were not here when he needed you. You were supposed to fix him back up, not me… I'm not the one he lo…“ Jensen looked behind himself to were Richard was staring at. Matt was walking towards them, some books in hand, clearly indicating that he must have been at the library. Jensen smiled remembering when they went to the library together and ended up making out in the history section…Yeah, not anymore.  
  
“You should leave now” Richard told him but he shook his head. ”N… no… I want to fix this, please all I’m asking is another chance.” And before Richard could answer, what Jensen pictured as a straight up no, Matt was there, on the porch with him.  
  
Jensen looked at him, mouth half opened, he almost had forgotten the perfection that Matt’s everything was. He was wearing a pair of dark jeans, the ones they bought together at the Gap store during a rainy Saturday, a grey hoodie that was loose and looked cosy, certainly it didn’t look like something his Matt would wear, same thing for the eyeglasses, black and thick framed, perfectly fitting on his face. Jensen looked at his eyes, the only thing he noticed there was sadness.  
  
“H… Hey Jensen… Wh…What are you doing here?” Matt asked as he walked next to Richard,who was now holding his books.  
  
“Matt… I wanted to talk, can we?” Matt looked at Jensen and at Richard, sighing.  
  
“Yeah, sure come in…Dick would you give us five minutes?” Richard stood firm next to the door, cold eyes on Jensen. “Please, I’ll be fine” Matt told him as he hugged him, he led Jensen to the kitchen, knowing Richard wouldn’t go upstairs. “So you wanted to talk, do it.“ Matt said not looking at his eyes and Jensen couldn’t help but shiver from the coldness in his voice.  
  
But it was worse than that. Matt moved in the kitchen as if Jensen was invisible. He opened the fridge and grabbed himself a beer, he opened it and took a few sips. Jensen watched how his lips wrapped around the bottle and how bad he needed those lips. How bad he missed them. He missed Matt. Matt finally turned to him, pressed against the fridge, beer in hand. He was looking at his feet, his glasses falling a little bit from his nose.  
  
"Nice glasses." Finally said Jensen.  
  
Matt put them back on his face but didn't turn to Jensen. He drank a little more before saying. "Well… figured I didn't need my contacts anymore so."  
  
"I never noticed the contacts thing…"  
  
"Just gonna add that to the list of thing you don't know about me, right Jensen?"  
  
Their eyes met, brief and simple. And it was the first time Jensen heard Matt say his name with so much hate in his voice. And it hurt, a lot. Jensen took a step to Matt and he saw Matt shiver a little. God… Matt was scared of him. Jensen bit his lower lip, looking for the right word.  
  
"Matt… I don't know… I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to say here. I'm sorry, it's too late, I know it. I shouldn't have said all those things to you, I shouldn't have left you alone, I should have been there and… I…"  
  
Matt didn't react in any way, he was just there, looking at his feet. Jensen sighed and took another step to him.  
  
"I was scared okay? And I still am, but I don't want to be like that, I don't want to run away anymore. It might sound dull but I want you Matt."  
  
Matt finally looked at him, hard expression on his face. "Then you have a funny way of showing it Jensen. Just… Just go okay?"  
  
"No. I won't go Matt… Please, listen to what I have to say. Just five minutes and I'm out. Out of this house, your life, you won't even hear from me anymore."  
  
Jensen didn't know how but his hands had found Matt's shoulders and he was grabbing him, pressing him even more against the fridge. They were close now, close like they used to be, when they were on the verge of kissing. Matt pulled from his grasp and Jensen's hands drops back to his own sides.  
  
"Make that two." whispered Matt.  
  
"Okay well…" Jensen took a deep breath and, looking into those green eyes, he spoke. More openly than he ever did. "I don't even know where to start. I wasn't expecting you in my life, I wasn't expecting this, I didn't know I would need you more than anything. This is not a cheesy pick up line and I'm so glad Misha and Jared dragged me into that club for my birthday. At first I just thought you were attractive and… it might sound super lame but I kept the helmet on my bed every night thinking of you, touching myself because of you. I told myself to get you out of my system. But then I talked to you and I couldn't help it. I couldn't because I discovered the most wonderful person ever : you're smart, funny, confident, always do your best to get what you want and you don't care about what people think. Sometimes you're reckless and do the most stupid things but that's you. You don't ever plan anything, you just live your life. You just make the most of it with a smile And I want to be part of it."  
  
When Jensen finished talking, he was out of breath. Matt's expression hadn't changed a bit and he looked at Jensen for a few minutes, before turning his head away, eyes closed. For Jensen, it was like a slap in the face. "Okay… You said two minutes and…"  
  
"Jensen shut up. Just shut the fuck up." Matt had opened his eyes and he looked at Jensen just like the time he had hit him. Jensen didn't move because of course he deserved it. He was completely surprised when Matt grabbed his face and gave him a quick kiss on his lips. Very brief, almost like a dream. Matt stayed there, right in front of Jensen, his glasses against Jensen skin.  
  
"Jensen you're a freaking idiot and I'm in love with you."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Yeah you heard me… I just love the way you see me… I'm not amazing, I'm not that… person you describe, I run away too when things are hard, I never finished anything in my life, you have something, a job a…"  
  
"Matt don't…"  
  
"Shut up will you? My turn to talk." He stole Jensen another kiss and, it was stronger than Jensen, he wrapped his arms around Matt's waist, holding him close. "When you said those things to me, it hurt. Because deep down, that's what I kept repeating to myself. And I never figured out why a guy like you was interested into a looser like me. So yeah, I waited for you to call, but you didn't, and I tried to move on with my life. I'm back at college, I have another job and… " Matt kissed him again. "I don't want to move on on you Jensen. But you did hurt me…"  
  
"I know, I'll make it right, I swear." Jensen was the one to kiss him this time, slipping his tongue inside Matt's mouth. The kiss became quickly heated, Matt's hands finding Jensens hair and pulling it, while Jensen's were more insistent on Matts back.  
  
"Jensen… wait please…" Matt gasped and managed to stop the kiss. His glasses were upside down and he had a light blush on his face. It was rare to see him blush. "If we're doing this again… we'll have to be slow okay?"  
  
"Okay. Anything you want, slow is good."  
  
"Good…" Matt took a deep breath and looked at where Jensens hands were. "Now please let me go before I change my mind."  
  
"Hmm… Just one last thing." Jensen kissed him softly, sucking his bottom lips. "I love you too."  
  
"Good. Very good. Please, Jen, your hands or I'm gonna rip off your clothes."  
  
Jensen laughed and did as he'd been told, Matt laughing too. And really, it was good to have that smile back.  
  
Jensen and Matt left after that Richard kindly walked into the kitchen and demanded access to his fridge, both of them now sitting on the couch, knees and hands touching but not as cuddled at they used to. Jensen thought there was  time for that. He had time, they both had.  
  
“So… our date on Friday” He said as Richard walked in the room and sat on the couch next to them.  
  
“Go on… I’m not planning on leaving anytime soon.”  
  
Matt rolled his eyes and smiled. “Richard may have a bit of anger towards you.”  
  
“I know…”  
  
“Well you were saying Jensen, you plan on taking him where?”  
  
“Dinner.”  
  
“Alright, Dick there is no need for this” Matt said.  
  
“No, there actually is need for this. Remember the plan Matt?”  
  
Matt looked down “Yes…”  
  
“Then follow it.” Richard said as he took a bite of his sandwich.  
  
“What plan?” Jensen smiled as he asked the question.  
  
“Mhm… nothing, Dick made some plans of action for me to follow in case you came back…or you didn’t.”  
  
“But I did.”  
  
“Yes… you did” Matt leaned over and sweetly kissed him, until Richard started making weird noises with his throat, and they parted.  
  
“Not following the plan Mattie.” He said, and then all of them started laughing. Jensen left the house with a big weight off his chest and smiling. He was a bit worried about Richard, that things were not going to be as easy as they were with Matt, but Jensen could deal with that, it was only right.  
  
♦♦♦  
  
The date was set a week from that day, so on Thursday night Jensen decided he had to do things properly this time, grabbed his phone and called Matt.  
  
“Hello.”  
  
“Hey Jensen how are you?”  
  
“Fine. Listen for tomorrow I want to make things right” He just heard Matt humming at him. “I thought about a fancy restaurant, you, me and good wine. How does it sound?” Jensen waited for an answer he didn’t get. "Are you even listening?”  
  
“Yeah, sorry I’m studying. You were saying stupid things about non important stuff.” He could hear Matt chuckling.  
  
“Oh… okay, well then suggestions?” Jensen tried not to sound to hurt, even if he was right now.  
  
“Yeah, I say we go back to the park…”  
  
“There won’t be anything interesting soon down there are you sure?”  
  
“I think you are interesting and that date was perfect to me, so I don’t see why you are getting worried about this things.”  
  
Jensen smiled “So, I’ll see you tomorrow at seven thirty.”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Fine, love you,keep on studying.” Jensen said before hanging up the phone and loudly calling Misha and Jared. “Guys, I will need your help” Misha smiled as he locked eyes with Jared and both sighed “How weird.”  
  
♦♦♦  
  
Danneel let him get out of work an hour earlier just to make sure he wasn’t late for his second-first date. It seemed like everybody wanted this to work out, and that made Jensen smile. He stopped at the grocery store while driving back home, bought some things Misha wrote down on a list called "How Misha  saves the day". He smiled at the cashier as he paid, and told her to have a nice evening. Jensen was definitely in a good mood. He was welcomed into the apartment by loud music, Sledge Sister blasting at the maximum volume to be exact. He smiled as he heard Jared and Misha singing along to We Are Family, completely out of key, while they cooked.  
  
He took off his jacket and joined them “Oh look who’s here Misha! Madame Lazy Butt! Do you think he will help us cook for his date?”  
  
“Shut up Jared you’ve been eating most of the time.”  
  
Jared shrugged “True,but I’m the official taster, we don’t want to poison the lovers.”  
  
Jensen laughed “Mish, here are the ingredients for your quiche.”  
  
“Perfect” said Misha as he grabbed the grocery bags “Now start peeling the potatoes, and you young…thingie” he pointed at Jared “Stop eating all of the food, we have two hours left to prepare a perfect dinner.”  
  
Jared dropped his spoon and looked at both of them before clapping his hands “Let's do this!”  Jensen loved his roommates, no, scratch that, Jensen loved his family.  
  
And, as always, cooking with Jared and Misha was fun. Jensen let Misha do his thing, he was always extremely serious about his quiche, while he and Jared did the mini sandwiches.  
  
"Seriously Jen… that's gay!"  
  
"Shut up and give me the cucumbers!"  
  
"Ask nicely!"  
  
"Jared… Give me those fucking cucumbers please?"  
  
"Ouch, you hurt my feelings." said Jared giving Jensen what he wanted. "You have quite a dirty mouth."  
  
"I think Matt likes that." Misha replied, right behind them.  
  
"I bet that's not the only part of Jensen he likes."  
  
"Why are we always talking about my sexual life… really guys?" Jensen pretended to be irritated, but he had a smile on his face.  
"Duh.. I thought it was obvious, Misha and I are just waiting for the perfect opportunity to make a tape of you and Matt, sell it to the porn industry and have enough money to buy a boat." Jared said that with a very serious tone, while Misha nodded.  
Jensen looked at the two of them and bursted out laughing. "How are we even friends again?"  
  
"Shut up Jensen." They both answered.  
  
♦♦♦  
  
  
"So?"  
  
"Hmmm…"  
  
Jensen and Matt were sitting down on the grass, on the infamous gay blanket to be more precise, Jensen was sitting on his knees and Matt was sitting cross-legged. He was chewing one of the cucumber sandwiches Jensen had made with Jared. He had his glasses on and, for Jensen's delight, he was still in full student mode. He was wearing a black cardigan with white stripes with a white shirt underneath and some low pants, in other words, he looked more than good. He swallowed and turned to Jensen, a full smile on his face.  
  
"Not that bad."  
  
"Good… Here have some more."  
  
Matt opened his mouth and mentioned to Jensen to feed him, which Jensen did, laughing.  
  
"Don't you think you're a little too old for that?"  
  
"But I'm super cute so…" managed to say Matt, mouth full.  
  
That made Jensen laughed even more before he sighed looking at Matt.  
  
"What? Do I have something on my face?" asked the latter.  
  
"No, your face is perfect…"  
  
"Shut up… Is it the glasses? God damn it, I knew it."  
  
Matt started to take his glasses off but Jensen stopped him. "Are you kidding? You look super hot with them on!"  
  
"Really?" Matt had a small pout on his face now and he didn't look convinced at all. But he was super adorable.  
  
Jensen rolled his eyes. "Like you didn't know it already… So how was your day?"  
  
"Fine…" Matt shrugged before he started eating Misha's quiche. "Boring classes and I have a lot of homework to do, but I guess I just need to learn how to study hard again. Psychology is super fascinating, but there's a lot of stuff to learn."  
  
"Yeah I guess… Why psychology by the way? Not that I do not appreciate the fact that you're back to college but… It seems…"  
  
"Weird?" Matt chuckled. "No, it seems logical to me. I mean, sometimes, when people would come buy their coffee they would talk to me about their issues… And at the strip club, most of my clients were there looking for some sort of escape because their life sucked… So I figured, what the hell!, why not? And here I am, a real student."  
  
“Well…” Jensen smiled “if you put it like this it does have a sense…So now you will start to outsmart me?”  
  
Matt licked his fingers clean before smiling and leaning closer to Jensen “When did I not?” He gave him a little kiss as he reached for the wine and served some for both of them.  
  
After some more wine and sandwiches and the famous “Misha’s quiche”, that Matt loved, “I may consider dating him the next time… He is funny and knows how to cook… A very charming man.”  
  
“Shut up!” said Jensen as he threw some grass at him.  
  
They  spent time talking about Jensen’s new patients, but mostly about Matt’s adventures in college, his new friends, his teachers, the classes he loved and the ones that made him want to kill himself in a slow and painful way. Jensen smiled and cuddled with Matt, thinking to himself how lucky he had been to have a second chance.  
  
“Hey Matt… Remember the kite you stole to that kid?”  
  
“Yeah,of course, but I didn’t steal it.”  
  
“Sure, well, it broke” Matt looked at him pouting “That sucks…it would have been good”  
  
“Well, Jay and I made one… It's not as good but-“ as he spoke he turned around and showed it to Matt.  
  
“Are you kidding me, it's so much better than the other one!” Jensen blushed as Matt kissed him and took the kite from his hands  
  
“Let’s make this bad boy fly” He held his hand out for Jensen to help him stand up  
  
“Matt, don’t think I can run after all this food.”  
  
“Well then you just stay here hands up high and look pretty for me, I’ll do all the work” and with that Matt was running away, smile bright on his face as that little red string connected him to Jensen. In that moment Jensen was glad Matt was far away, because he would have guessed all the things he was thinking. Jensen was gay…in all the wrong ways, but he couldn’t be bothered.  The kite finally rose up in the sky, Jensen run towards Matt, that didn’t notice him as he looked up at the kite, making it dance in the sky.  
  
Jensen crossed his arms around Matt’s waist and kissed his neck “You were right” Matt looked at him, confusion in his eyes “About what this time?”  
  
“This being perfect, thank you.”  
  
Matt smiled, bright and radiant and pressed himself against Jensen. "You don't need to thank me dumbass. If I remember correctly, you were the one suggesting we dated in the first place and..."  
  
Matt stopped talking, looking back at the kite. "And?"  
  
"And I'm glad I changed my mind for you, so thank you Jensen"  
  
Matt spun around this time, he let go of the kite, grabbing Jensen's face with both of his hands, kissing him. And it felt good, just like that. Jensen realized that Matt was the thing he needed in his perfect and organized life, his missing 1% you could say, and it was good.


End file.
